As I sit in my bed, I refresh my Instagram feed over and over...without even noticing. I'll look through my feed once, close the app, and open another social media app and repeat. The fact that this is a reoccurring event night after night is a bit scary. We are constantly consumed by social media and wondering what other people are doing or even worse -- wondering what people think about what we are posting.
I had the eye-opening experience of realizing how wrapped up I am in my phone this summer. Boarding the flight to Idaho, I said goodbye to my friends and boyfriend because I knew there would be little to no service in the small towns I was traveling to. I posted one last Instagram and turned my phone on airplane mode for the week as I whitewater rafted into a new perspective about cell phones and social media.
My family was embarking on a journey consisting of whitewater rafting down the Middle Fork of the Salmon river in Idaho. Joined by 13 other guests and six guides, we traveled over 75 miles of rapids with no technology except for our cameras. I'm not going to lie, not having my phone was a complete drag the first few days. I was wondering what everyone from my city was doing, how the concerts were that I missed, and wondering how the going away parties were.
But after a while, surrounding myself with good people and a better view than I had ever seen before, I completely forgot about not being connected. I was connected to something greater than technology -- I made real friendships and was able to learn more about my family members than I had in my 18 years of life because of the lack of distractions. As the time quickly flew by because of how much fun we were all having, it came to the time where we got off the river and drove to a town where there was cell service and Wi-Fi.
I turned on my phone, checked Facebook and I literally felt my stomach turn into a knot. I saw some of my "friends" going out to dinners and parties without me and I had zero text messages inviting me to them. Even after a whole week of fun, a 45-second social media check changed my attitude drastically. Why does social media have this power over me?
Realizing that I spend an incredible amount of time worried about others instead of having fun in real life was mind-blowing. I think that was the hardest part of this recognition. However, you learn and grow from your mistakes and I am so happy that I acknowledged this before leaving for college. Everyone wants to seem cool on social media, when in reality, things aren't typically the way they seem. Focus on yourself, take a breath, and live in the moment.