Sometimes, when I take the time to just breathe, pause, and notice how I'm feeling, I often realize I'm more tired than I thought I was. I started to wonder: Why is that? And there could be a variety of reasons like work, extracurriculars, and midterms to name a few, but those are some of the out-in-the-open, obvious things to consider.
It could also be something that's not so obvious, something that is almost so innate that you hardly ever notice it. For me, that was the case this time. I realized that I had my guard up a lot more than I thought I did. By that, I mean that I spent so much more time than is necessary thinking about the way people perceived me.
How do I appear to the world?
Am I standing out too much?
Are people staring at me?
On the surface, I seemed to be basing my happiness on what others thought. What's more important, though, is that I was using a lot of cognitive energy on something I neither had control over nor could determine with accuracy. People don't have thought bubbles floating above their heads!
And in this constant worrying, it's only natural to find one's self oddly drained and tired. All the energy that could have otherwise been used to make a balanced state of mind more effortless has gone into stressing over public opinion.
Instead, use that precious energy to identify what your opinion of yourself is and how it needs to be changed to benefit you, not hurt you.
Let that guard down (the one that makes you stiff and tensed) and feel free with your likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses, habits and tastes.
When we say "be yourself," we might as well be saying "let your guard down," because the expectation is that you be authentic to who you are. And if you're worried about being accepted for who you really are, honestly speaking don't worry about it.
Accepting yourself as you are attracts the very same into your life.