To The Broken 'Strong Friend,' Remember To Take Care Of Yourself, Too
When you feel like the whole world is depending on you...
Every group of girls has that one friend who is considered the "strong friend" or more commonly known as the "mom friend," and with this title comes a lot of responsibility. You are the one who takes care of everyone, who cleans up every mess, and ultimately the person that holds it all together.
Since my freshman year of high school, I have always been that friend, even to the extent that at my senior prom I got the "most mom like award." I always thought of it as an honor: I was the one who my friends trusted with everything. What I did not realize until recent events, is that I had never really taken care of myself. I never took the time to make sure I was okay on my own because I was too busy worrying about everyone else and making sure they were okay. When I became broken, my whole friend group was fell apart. What I have since discovered is that, as many country songs have quoted, you do indeed, "find out who your friends are."
What I would like to tell all the "strong friends" out there is that God did not intend for us to carry the weight of it all. He definitely did not intend for us to rely on ourselves to have the power to make sure everyone is happy. He needs for us to break sometimes, so we realize that in the chaos of thinking we have it all together, we ultimately are a mess without His power, without His joy and without His unconditional love.
Whether it is a hard breakup, a fight with your parents, a loss of a relative or just school getting the best of you, He is a jealous God and He will be quick to remind you that it is in Him where you find rest, where you find strength to face the day and where you find a love that will never fail you. And while yes, most of us "strong friends" have the spiritual gifts of grace and mercy, we must remind ourselves that sometimes we need a break, sometimes we need time to breathe, and sometimes we need to truly be ourselves. You might lose some "friends" when you do this, you may hurt some feelings, but girl you have got to catch a break.
God promises to never leave or forsake us, so you are never in this alone. Do not be afraid to break, to fail, to cry, or to throw a fit. Life will go on, and you will end up with a group of friends that encourage you to be the best possible version of yourself. Trust in that and go find your girls.
xoxo,
A Broken "Strong" friend