15 Jokes To Keep You Laughing If You Think You Failed Your Finals
After the worst week of the year, we could all use a few good laughs.
Finals week is by far the most stressful and exhausting week of the semester for college students. We take exams that are worth 30% or more of our final grade, we're mentally and physically exhausted from all the final projects, and we really just want to enjoy our upcoming break. It's hard to stay motivated, let alone laughing through the week, especially if you think you did poorly on your finals.
Here are a few cute jokes to put a smile on your face after finals week, especially if you don't think you did too well!
1. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
Because it was two-tired!
2. What did the tree say to the wind?
Leaf me alone!
3. What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
4. What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her?
Namaste.
5. Why don't they play poker in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs!
6. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten-tickles!
7. When does a joke become a dad joke?
When the punchline is a parent!
8. What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
9. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investi-gator!
10. How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
11. What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
12. What did one oar say to the other?
Are you up for a little row-mance?
13. Why do bananas use sunscreen?
Because they peel!
14. What's the name of a pepper that won't leave you alone?
Jalapeño Business.
15. Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?
It was stuck in a crack!
5 Off-Color Things People Say To You When You Have Colorful Hair
"You do know your hair is green, right?"
I've dyed my hair almost every color in the rainbow at some point in my life. It's a fun way to express myself, stand out in the crowd, and honestly I just like the way it looks.
But, other people often question the fact that the color of my hair does not fall into the "natural" hair color spectrum, which consists of a million shades of brown (and "red" which is really just a super warm-toned brown).
I have learned to expect a few main reactions in public: stares, compliments, and, you guessed it, weird comments.
Here are five you can anticipate receiving or overhearing if you have a hair color that belongs more on a rainbow than in the "50 shades of brown" spectrum.
"Mommy, why is her hair *insert color here*?"
Pexels
Chances are, you're the first person with green/purple/blue/etc. hair that a child may see in their life. They've never seen a color sprouting out of someone's head that isn't some variation of brown (be it a warm brown, a light brown, a dark brown, etc.).
"You must eat a lot of *insert food that is the same color as your hair*."
Pexels
This is a dad joke that you'll get a lot, and it will never get any funnier.
"Did you know your hair is *insert color here*?"
Pexels
No, I had no idea that I had bright green hair. Must've missed it when I looked in the mirror to brush my teeth this morning.
"Wow, that is some *insert color here* hair!"
Flickr
Thank you...?
"Does that wash out?"
Flickr
All colored hair dyes are non-permanent. Permanent hair dyes alter the color of your natural hair permanently, for example with hydrogen peroxide, whereas semi-permanent or temporary colors add color on top of your natural one and fade over time.
There is no such thing as a pink hair dye that will last "forever" and not fade away eventually, whether it's after one wash or twenty washes (which is realistically almost impossible to achieve for a pink dye).
So, yes, it will wash out, but most likely not as quickly as a lot of adults would like it to.