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19 Symptoms You Have If You Are 20 Going On 80

Being a grandma stuck in a twenty-something person is quite the adventure.

Caitlin Johnston

Jan 07, 2019

Syracuse University

122

19 Symptoms You Have If You Are 20 Going On 80

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Born with an old soul?

I am here to tell you, you are not alone.

Confused by the symptoms you have been having? Here is your guide to all things old age.

1. Night in > night out

Can we have stay in tonight?

but actually every night

2. You are running thin on excuses to not go out.

3. A night out really means leaving by 6 and being back by 9 at the latest.

A quick film, or dinner party? Yes please.

4. A wild night usually means starting a movie or new episode after 9.

5. Books are better than people.

Always.

6. Bed time is 9 at the latest.

7. Trendy references go right over your head.

FOMO? Uhhhh

8. Early mornings are the best parts of your day.

9. Constant mood: cranky.

10. Outdated music tastes.

Oldies but goodies for the win.

Frank Sinatra? Yes, please.

11. You lose things that are in your hands.

**loses glasses

**spends 10 minutes looking for them

**realizes they are in your hand

12. Updates for phones are the devil.

You just got used to the new way the phone is set up, and then a new update comes along and you have to spend the next few months adjusting to this new way of living.

13. What is Tinder?

14. Older people > younger people.

15. The online crosswords are a major entertainment stream for you.

They may be the online ones, but still.

16. HGTV and Food Network are the highlights of your day.

17. Forgetting is a routine part of your day.

18. Every morning you are a symphony of cracking joints.

19. Once you make it out of bed, your only word is "ow".

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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19 Symptoms You Have If You Are 20 Going On 80

Being a grandma stuck in a twenty-something person is quite the adventure.

1. Night in > night out

2. You are running thin on excuses to not go out.

3. A night out really means leaving by 6 and being back by 9 at the latest.

4. A wild night usually means starting a movie or new episode after 9.

5. Books are better than people.

6. Bed time is 9 at the latest.

7. Trendy references go right over your head.

8. Early mornings are the best parts of your day.

9. Constant mood: cranky.

10. Outdated music tastes.

11. You lose things that are in your hands.

12. Updates for phones are the devil.

13. What is Tinder?

14. Older people > younger people.

15. The online crosswords are a major entertainment stream for you.

16. HGTV and Food Network are the highlights of your day.

17. Forgetting is a routine part of your day.

18. Every morning you are a symphony of cracking joints.

19. Once you make it out of bed, your only word is "ow".

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"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

1. I'm so tired. I need a nap. Maybe I can sleep with my eyes open in class? Or pretend I'm not napping?

2. We have a test today? Why didn't anyone tell me? Did I know this?!

3. Can I quit school yet? It's only October, and I need a vacation.

4. The struggle is so real.

5. I'm so broke. SOS.

6. Stressed? Eat everything you own in your pantry and stuff your face with all your feelings.

7. "Did we have anything due in class today? Homework? Quiz? Test?" "Not that I know of..."

8. I need food. Where is the closest place to get food? I need it stat.

9. This is the longest day of my life. I need a drink, or two, or three.

10. Sleep? What is sleep? What a foreign concept.

11. When someone suggests going and studying in the library, let alone studying in general.

12. When the cafeteria or student center is packed and you can't find a seat anywhere so you literally have to sit in an abandoned corner.

13. When you see someone you used to hook up with. They see you, and approach you; so you have to pretend like everything is normal.

14. When you get your exam and realize you didn't study as much as you should have.

15. When you crush it on an exam or paper that you totally bullshitted.

16. I need a grande, extra strong coffee to get me through today.

17. When the professor announces you have a project due the following week with no instruction on what it's on and how to do it.

18. Is it Friday yet? Where's the weekend when you need it most?

19. It's freezing in here. I feel like I'm sitting in an igloo. I should have brought a jacket or worn long pants.

20. Did I remember my book? Damn, I forgot the book, and of course I need it for that quiz in class.

21. I would pay a million dollars to not go to class today; or actually never again.

22. I need a hoverboard to ride to class. Maybe then I wouldn't be running 15 minutes late to class every day.

23. Oh she/he's cute! I wonder if they're single. Who are they texting? They're BF/GF? I wonder if they think I'm cute. Could they be a potential new bae?

24. Why is there never any parking? I pay thousands of dollars a year for one parking spot to be open.

25. When it feels like you've been in class for an hour and you look at your phone and it has only been five minutes (I'm crying on the inside).

26. When the professor asks if there are any more questions at the end of class and someone raises their hand.

27. When you get assigned the most incompetent group of people possible for a group project.

28. I need a comfort dog so I can avoid all life and school responsibilities.

"A Christmas Story" is the star on top of the tree.

Who isn't stressing out over finals right now?

'tis the season to be jolly!

May the odds be ever in your favor.

Phase One: The “I got this” phase

Phase Two: The “I have time” phase

Phase Three: The uncontrollable sobbing phase

Phase Four: The “help me, I've fallen and I can't get up” phase

Phase Five: The rejoicing phase

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