Domestic abuse--it's something we all know about, but perhaps not as much as we should. It's something I am sad to say that I have first hand experience with.

The worst feeling is to feel hurt by the person who swore it was something they would never do. A study reported in 2012 by the Huffington Post shows that an average of 24 people per minute experience domestic abuse of some sort, and that's just in the United States. Can you imagine what that number would look like for the entire world?

There are 5 types of domestic abuse: sexual, emotional, physical, financial, and spiritual. In one relationship, I suffered from four of those, maybe even five. Most of the time, you never realize that what they are doing, is considered to be abuse. It gets endured due to that, and that's why awareness is so very important.

From personal experience, I can honestly say that one of the top reasons for staying in a relationship where domestic abuse is involved is fear. Fear can be from the abuse itself, or even fear of starting over again. It took me almost a year and a half to get out of an abusive relationship.

The victims of domestic abuse sometimes never realize how bad things actually are until it's too late. The victim loves the abuser, and always wants to believe that they will change. Often, the victim will actually begin to believe that they deserve what is being done to them. This could not be more wrong. That very feeling is what can and will give your abuser power.

I personally experienced almost all forms of domestic abuse in my relationship with one person. I can't bring myself to call him a man, because a man would never do any of these things in my opinion. I was a victim of financial, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. He swore he loved me, but why would you hurt someone you love? That's the lie, that keeps all victims with their abusers for however long they stay.

Here are examples, and real life experiences as to how he used each of the four out of five types of domestic abuse against me.

Physical -

When he didn't get his way, or if I was going to leave, was when he would physically abuse me. Things he did included punching, holding me against a brick wall and choking me. He would push me so that I would fall over things that would cause me to meet face first with the concrete. He has slapped me across the face, put me through a wall, and even tried suffocating me with a pillow.

Did I try to defend myself? Of course I did. I'm not sure if I was simply unable, in shock from what was happening, or if the fear of it all had struck me in a way I did not or refused to understand. All I kept thinking to myself was, "Why is he doing this? I thought he loved me. What have I done to deserve this?" It became so frequent, that I began to just do anything to keep him happy, whether I suffered for it or not.

Emotional-

Emotional abuse is the most common of the five types, and is often looked over and not takng seriously. He used to call me names, talk down to me, showed extreme jealousy, made outrageous accusations, as well as making life theats to me and those close to me whom only tried to protect me. He also did everything in his power to keep me from everyone. I almost lost alot of people during this relationship. He wouldn't let me see my friends or family, and if I did, he would make me feel guilty, and the physical abuse would always happen after I was home.

Financial-

Now, this is a form of abuse that I wasn't entirely aware of even existed, until recently. He exhibited this type of abuse by stealing, withholding my own money from me, controlling the money I made, as well as forcing me to work while he refused to. When my entire income tax mysteriously disappeared, he claimed his bank account was hacked. Deep down, I knew better. I went without so much, because he took everything. This includes the day I left, which I will talk about later. Everything I worked for, money he took, items I paid for--I never saw any of it after I was able to get out. In my opinion, it was worth losing. Material things are all replaceable, whereas a life, is not.

Sexual-

Some women have experienced their significant other talking them into sex even if they don't want to. My abuser was guilty of sexual abuse by forcing me into sex when I was either too tired or sick, as well as forcing me to do certain sexual things that I was uncomfortable with. Men can be succumbed to this as well, so do not think that only men can be the abusers. The same goes for any act of domestic abuse.

Getting Out-

I still remember this day like it was yesterday. The day started out like any other, except it was my day off of work. We got up, and went to pick up my paycheck. Keep in mind, that he never wanted to do anything unless it involved money that I had worked for. I went and bought groceries for the house, like I did every week on payday. We lived with his mother, and younger sister. He used to put the fear in their eyes as well. He then took what was left for pills. I was never okay with it, but had grown accustomed to him doing what he wanted, when he wanted. We had a disagreement that night, and I can't remember why but it set me over the edge.

One thing he would never do, is put his hands on me in front of his mother. Sometimes, you have someone step in to protect you, and it could be the last person you would ever expect. His mother was one of the few people who tried to protect me.

When I had finally reached my point, where enough was enough, I started to pack my stuff. He told me I wasn't leaving him, and he began to come towards me. I quickly made my way out of our room, and woke up his mother. I explained to her that I was leaving, and without hesitation, she got out of bed and came with me to the bedroom. I contacted my mother, and my stepfather was immediately on his way to get me. As I was almost at the door, he charged at me. I felt my heart race, preparing for the blow. To my surprise, it never happened. His mother stepped in, and held him back, giving me the opportunity to leave before he could get to me.

I'm not going to say that it wasn't difficult. I almost went back to him twice. I was fortunate enough that I chose different. Relationships since then have come, and they have gone. It hurts to say, but I am still emotionally scarred from this. It's not something that you can simply erase, even though I bet we would if it were possible.

Getting out all comes down to you. It takes courage, strength, and the ability to stand your ground. It's never easy, and no matter how terrible and dangerous the situation is for you, it will tug at your heart. I wish that it wasn't this way, but you loved this person.

It has been almost two years since I was able to get out of this awful relationship. Domestic abuse is not something I would wish on anyone. I chose to include pictures during with my relationship with this man to show one thing:

No matter how something looks on the outside, you never really know whats going on behind closed doors.

Victims of domestic abuse often cover for their abusers. This includes lying for them, defending them, and condoning the things they do as okay.

There's not much left to say except I'm here, I'm free, and thankfully: I survived.