After seven years of being a vegetarian living in a meat-eating family, I have learned how to navigate a Thanksgiving holiday that doesn’t cater to your wants and needs. You can be very thankful for all the food your family has on Thursday, but alas, what will you eat? What will your family say about it this time? Is there even a point to going? Do not fear, my kale loving friends! Here are some ideas on what you can do to still enter a food coma after dinner.

1. Know what you can eat.

Sadly, stuffing isn’t always vegetarian as it can be made with chicken stock and cooked inside the turkey. But you can make your own out of a box with water and that will work just fine! Or if you want to be fancy, follow this recipe for vegan stuffing! Chicken stock is your enemy on Thanksgiving. Your grandma may think its vegetarian, but she used a pint of chicken stock in those mashed potatoes just for kicks. Ask and keep an eye out while people are cooking. Or if you’re more like me, turn a blind eye and just enjoy it.

2. Treat it like tapas.

There are many different dishes on the traditional Thanksgiving dinner table. Have a little bit of everything that’s vegetarian and you’ll be full of mashed potatoes and green beans and yams and bread in no time. (A little wine never hurt anyone in this endeavor either.) This is an especially good strategy if your family mixes traditional Thanksgiving foods with, for example, Italian food like my family. Try a little bit of everything.

3. Don’t get frustrated when your family doesn’t get it.

Your Uncle Jim who hunts and eats deer isn’t going to stop making jokes about you being a vegetarian, and your mom is probably going to try to guilt you into eating some turkey. Don’t snap at them. There are more important things to fight about this Thanksgiving, and you don’t want to segue into a family blowout through something like this. Keep your cool, smile and wait until the political debates start to get feisty.

4. Help cook!

If you’re in the kitchen, you can make things you can eat. Quiche is what I ate at Thanksgiving for years. It fits the Thanksgiving aesthetic (and you can buy a frozen one and just throw it in the oven.) If you’re the one cooking, you’ll be sure to make sure your vegetables stay vegetarian. Also, hang out with your family in the kitchen. If you’re not living at home anymore, they miss you and want to spend time with you.

5. It’s OK to cheat.

Nobody needs to know, and I promise your family isn’t going to hold it against you. If you smell the turkey (or in my case, delicious meatballs) just eat some. It’s OK. One cheat day isn’t going to invalidate you as a vegetarian. Nobody really cares but you.

6. Wait until dessert!

Bless the Lord that there’s no meat in apple pie! If your dinner options are limited, that just means there’s more room for whatever desserts are lined up next. Eat some pie and ice cream, then fall asleep on the couch like a true American.

This Thanksgiving is going to be difficult for a lot of people. Recent events are still fresh in everyone’s minds and if there’s tension around the table, don’t be afraid to stick up for yourself. Listen to what your family is saying, but stay true to what you believe in. Don’t be afraid to soul search, but you don’t need to compromise your identity for any possibly close minded beliefs of your family, whether that’s being vegetarian or LGBTQ+.

Happy Thanksgiving, my fellow Americans!