Last year I had my heart broken. I thought I was going to die because it felt worse than death, but even with an ache that seemed detrimental to my happiness, time passed by and life moved on. Looking back now, I wouldn’t have changed a thing. I haven’t ever been happier to have something so bad happen to me. Having your heart broken puts you in this really awful low place that you didn’t even know you could sink. But in the midst of all that darkness, and with copious amounts of time, a light begins to emerge. It’s like a renaissance. Even something ugly can spring a rebirth into something beautiful.

This is a survival guide to your broken heart and everything you can do in the meantime while you are waiting for it to thaw and continue to beat.

1. Try new things.

The best part about trying new things is that you will begin learning more about yourself. Learning more about yourself will help to facilitate a better relationship with the MVP (yourself) by learning to accept self-love. If you can learn to love yourself after it feels like you can’t love anything, that’s it. You’ve done it. You’ve survived your broken heart. The only one that can make your heart whole again is yourself.

2. Start inventing a new you.

This is very important to surviving your broken heart. The old you was the one that was heartbroken. The new you is the one that learned from it and accepted it by now. This is the part where you need to say yes and see what the new you likes. Maybe you like pistachio ice cream now. Maybe you like older women. Maybe you just dyed all your hair pink, who knows.

3. Take care of yourself.

Along the way, one thing often overlooked but detrimental if forgotten is taking care of yourself. I mean hygiene, folding your favorite blanket near your bed, or leaving yourself a positive note or treating yourself to that new watch you have your eye on. This is one way to start on having more self-love. Think about it. When someone else shows you acts of kindness or does something sweet to take care of you, you might not be able to help but feel some love from that. Treating yourself that way will only make you appreciate yourself better. Don’t forget to drink lots of water and maybe get yourself a candy bar on the first day back to school.

4. Accept Yourself.

Another part of self-love is accepting yourself. If you spend all of your time angry at yourself that your hair looks a certain way or that you aren’t the best at math, just stop. I mean don’t try to stop getting better at math but accepting that you are great at 100 other things means not being so hard on yourself. Everyone has flaws and accepting that they are part of the unique person you are is great for your self-love.

5. Hang in there.

You have made it through every awful crummy day so far, and you can make it through this. Don’t forget to try new things, invent a new you, and practice self-love through taking care of you and acceptance and you’ll be happy again.

As Tolkien said, “It's like in the great stories…the ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end… because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing… this shadow. Even darkness must pass.” Even your broken heart will pass.