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If SUNY Schools Were Girls You Went To High School With

Binghamton was the nicest girl in school and somehow perfect at literally everything

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If SUNY Schools Were Girls You Went To High School With
SUNY.edu

If you grew up in New York, chances are 85 percent of your graduating class ended up in a SUNY (State University of New York).

There is nothing wrong with that, the SUNY system offers a great education at an affordable cost (and now recently free tuition to those who qualify) while having dozens of campuses all over the state.

That being said, because of them having such big student bodies and followings, it's not very hard to start stereotyping them.

1. SUNY Binghamton - The All-American, All-Academic Hero

Bing was the nicest girl in school and somehow perfect at literally everything. She made the conference first team every year for soccer, starting guard on the basketball team, anchored the 4x4 in track and somehow managed to be valedictorian all at the same time. She couldn't afford the Ivy league and is now developing the cure for cancer in the library.

2. SUNY Oswego - The Girl Who Always Blacked Out At School Events

Oswego was the girl who never learned how to properly mix her liquors with her chasers and always ended up with too much rum in her Gatorade bottle. She always told her parents she was staying at your house when it was the night of a football game but was really dying in a field somewhere after the final whistle. Was escorted out of prom for sneaking vodka in her purse.

3. SUNY Purchase - The Try Hard Hipster Girl

Purchase dresses in quirky outfits that usually involve some sort of activist movement's slogan that she has probably only seen a tweet about. Thinks Halsey isn't mainstream and has her lyrics tattooed somewhere near her boob. Carries a carton of cigarettes but doesn't even inhale the smoke. Writes Odyssey articles in her dorm because her voice matters.

4. SUNY New Paltz - The "Just One of The Boys" girl

Paltz spent her high school years wearing cuffed skinny jeans--so her HUFF socks peeked over her black high tops--to parties, and only hung out with guys because 'they were less drama.' Said guys only hung out with her because she ran an underground weed operation out of her locker. Showed up to graduation high out of her mind and everyone laughed.

5. SUNY Geneseo - The Most Popular Girl In School

Geneseo was a huge daddy's girl whose Dad was a law enforcement officer or in the army so she was always looking for a guy to give her attention when he couldn't. Her longest relationship was three months. She always had her make-up perfect even though she only wore leggings and yoga pants in order show off her volleyball player butt. Somehow was always the most photographed in the yearbook and nobody knew why.

6. FIT - The Best Dressed Girl in School

Geneseo bought FIT her favorite iced coffee from Dunkin every day for a month so she would be the most featured in the yearbook. FIT was in Key Club, NHS, Editor in Chief for the yearbook committee, voted best dressed, voted most likely to be on her phone and the only one who had two senior superlatives. Her Macbook is full of her digital portfolio that she will one day submit to Vogue.

7. SUNY Albany - The Cheerleader

Has "Just a small town girl" followed by the tractor, fishing pole and the pink bow emoji in her Instagram bio even though you live Ossining or Poughkeepsie. Blasts country music in the Jeep Wrangler she has even though she couldn't drive it for a year until her boyfriend taught her to drive stick. Retweeted that "I Am A Female and I Am So Over Feminism" Odyssey article. Voted for Trump because that's who her family voted for.

8. SUNY Oneonta - "The Inbetweener"

Oneonta was the girl who wasn't exactly popular but also wasn't unpopular. She was on the swimming team and in so many clubs that she was practically friends with every social circles. Voted to all the courts every year but never actually won anything. Got trashed at her first grad party and never went back. She peaked in college.

9. SUNY Fredonia - The Drama Queen

Was far too dramatic for the popular kids so she made the music department her domain. Hogs all the straight guys' attention and negotiates with the chorus instructor for all the good solos. Fully expects to be a tony award winning actress after she attains her Bachelor's in theater and practices her autograph in her spare time.

10. SUNY Buffalo - The Salutatorian

Ten times bitchier than Bing because she was .23 shy of clinching the Valedictorian spot she's had since freshman year until the last semester of high school. Has devoted her entire life to creating the perfect college application down to the carefully crafted list of extracurricular activities. President of Key Club, NHS and student body president. Already accepted as Pre-Law and has her summer internship picked out. Will actually kill you if you take her unassigned spot in the senior parking lot.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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