The three pillars to complete self-care according to me are - mind, body and spirit. I did not realize the importance of those three things until I failed them all, which destroyed my physical and mental health. They say you learn from your mistakes and boy did I learn. This article is going to focus on those three pillars and how I failed them. Additionally, I'll talk about what I did with my failed attempts of self-care and how I focused, and am still focusing on, strengthening those three foundations.

1. Mind

I was among the many who saw mental health as a cliche, over-used medical term that people used to get out of plans or not leave their beds. Looking back, that stereotype hurts the person that was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety - me. You never know the effects of something until it happens to you and though we are told time and time again to step into others' shoes, human beings have a tendency to be selfish and keep to their close-minded stereotypes.

My doctor had told me that I should have been diagnosed with clinical depression since the age of 12 but because of the stereotypes associated with mental health and my fear of what my parents would say - I ignored all the signs. It wasn't until I was alone in college that I realized that I was not the same as the people I was surrounding myself with. I could not get out of bed as my roommate could. I could not get myself to care or be motivated in my classes - my bed was the only thing running in my mind. I loved spending time with my friends but I could feel myself being completely detached from the conversations. I always tried to fuel myself with a passion, but I had lost that with every aspect of my life.

I would break down and have panic attacks because of the smallest things and it was not until I found an inkling of courage and ran with it to my university's CAPS center. There I found the courage to speak to my parents and focus on my journey out of this pit I have been in for most of my life. I was put on anti-depressants and anxiety pills because there was a chemical imbalance in my brain that was never treated and let me in a tunnel without a light or a way to get out. My medications along with therapy have been what has made me realize how real mental health is and how it should be treated with utmost care like any other disease. I put everything on hold this summer - my study abroad, my education, etc., to work on being the better me and growing. It is so important to acknowledge mental health as a disease that has a cure out there.

The realization that I wasn't alone and that what I was feeling wasn't my fault has been so relieving. I made efforts to surround myself with positivity, do things that I lost interest in but know that I once used to love, take my medicine on time, write in my journal and talk to my therapist. You cannot help others before you help yourself and are able to the best version of you and that is the goal I have been striving for every day.

2. Body

I have been overweight my entire life and it has crushed my self-esteem ever since I could remember. I was constantly gaining weight because of my depression and PCOS disease. I had two factors going against me so I gave up because the push for those two factors was too intense for me. I started eating out a lot more, paid little to no attention to what I was eating, and stopped any sort of exercise because I felt as though I was already defeated.

My doctor then spoke to me and told me that both my physical and mental health have to be aligned for me to be the best version of myself. I had never correlated the two but I started to see the connection. Exercise releases happy endorphins so it's a treatment itself. Eating healthy just makes you feel like you are doing something good for yourself. With those two things in mind, I set out to change my lifestyle in a way that would help my physical body. I am still struggling but I try to drink as much water as I can, cook as many meals in my apartment, walk everywhere and exercise 3-4 times a week as a start.

Every week this summer I have tried to introduce something new but small that I can build on. Whether that be trying out a yoga class or using wheat bread instead of white bread - it is the small things that are starting to have a big effect on me.

3. Spirit

I cling to my faith in times of difficulty and look to it for answers but while I was at my lowest I forgot my spirit and God were my cheerleaders and were holding my hands through my journey. Faith is a such a personal thing and is not recognized by everyone. However, for me, it has brought me great peace and has given me a purpose in life. Through faith, I found that I have a purpose and God has a purpose. He wants me to do something for his creation and I will live my life to seek that out. I had forgotten about this purpose and felt lost but ever since I started acknowledging and appreciating my faith this summer - I feel whole.