I've spent three years in college. That's 1,095 days, 26,280 hours, 6 semesters, 74 credit hours, countless nights studying, a few partying, a regret or two, heartbreaks, friendships, and the absolute best and worst times of my life. That being said, the last three years have been absolutely exhausting, and I cannot WAIT to be done.
...or can I?
As I prepare to enter into my last year of college and eventually venture off into the real world, I can't help but have these thoughts.
Modern Kitchen
Soap on Floor
Scent and flowers
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expecting the unexpected
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lightning mcqueen Cars Movie
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alphabet
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color of mirrors
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mind readers
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similar
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shirt isn't tucked into your pants
Photo by Vanessa Serpas on Unsplash
quick sand sinking
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Try to Fail
Photo by Jan Antonin Kolar on Unsplash
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1. You won't see the sunrise or have your favorite breakfast in the morning.
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Instead, your family will mourn the sunrise because it means another day without you.
2. You will never stay up late talking to your friends or have a bonfire on a summer night.
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3. You won't laugh until you cry again, or dance around and be silly.
4. You won't go on another adventure. You won't drive around under the moonlight and stars.
They'll miss you. They'll cry.
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5. You won't fight with your siblings only to make up minutes later and laugh about it.
6. You won't get to interrogate your sister's fiancé when the time comes.
7. You won't be there to wipe away your mother's tears when she finds out that you're gone.
8. You won't be able to hug the ones that love you while they're waiting to wake up from the nightmare that had become their reality.
9. You won't be at your grandparents' funeral, speaking about the good things they did in their life.
Instead, they will be at yours.
10. You won't find your purpose in life, the love of your life, get married or raise a family.
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11. You won't celebrate another Christmas, Easter or birthday.
12. You won't turn another year older.
13. You will never see the places you've always dreamed of seeing.
14. You will not allow yourself the opportunity to get help.
15. You will have seen your last sunset, a beautiful and stunning display.
16. You'll never see the sky change from a bright blue to purples, pinks, oranges, and yellows meshing together over the landscape again.
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If the light has left your eyes and all you see is the darkness, know that it can get better. Let yourself get better.
This is what you will miss if you leave the world today. This is who will care about you when you are gone.
You can change lives. But I hope it's not at the expense of yours.
We care. People care. Don't let today be the end.
You don't have to live forever sad. You can be happy. It's not wrong to ask for help.
Thank you for staying. Thank you for fighting.
Suicide is a real problem that no one wants to talk about. I'm sure you're no different. But we need to talk about it. There is no difference between being suicidal and committing suicide. If someone tells you they want to kill themselves, do not think they won't do it. Do not just tell them, “Oh you'll be fine." Because when they aren't, you will wonder what you could have done to help. Sit with them however long you need to and tell them it will get better. Talk to them about their problems and tell them there is help. Be the help. Get them assistance. Remind them of all the things they will miss in life.
If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline — 1-800-273-8255
