My Suicide Poem That Helped Me Heal | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

My Suicide Poem That Helped Me Heal

Writing this poem, although dark as it may be, helped me tremendously.

588
My Suicide Poem That Helped Me Heal

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline — 1-800-273-8255

Going through every day, never knowing if I would feel true happiness again in my life I began to fall down a never-ending rabbit hole of depression. Never wanting to leave my bed and make plans with anyone. Dealing with self-hatred and heartbreak all at once was too much to endure.

Locking myself away from others seemed to be the only solution. The only cure to fixing this broken girl that looked back at me in the mirror.

Self-harm crossed my mind numerous times and I thought about ending it all on occasions, but something in my mind stopped me. Maybe it was the counseling I put myself through, my faith in God or my writing that helped me escape the grip in which the darkness had over me.

Whichever one it was or a combination of all three I decided to put my darkest thoughts onto paper.

Having those feelings be released from my mind without physically attempting to take my own life helped put into retrospect that even though I was at my all-time low and depressed all the time, at the end of the day I didn't want to de. I didn't want to give up this life that I was blessed with, even if I felt all alone and lost in this world.

The scars that I put on my own body, even if they are almost completely faded are a constant daily reminder of the struggles I endured and the darkness I pulled myself out of.

Here's the poem I wrote at the lowest point in my life. Writing out the mental chaos and fight my mind was having with itself.

Depression didn't win this battle, I did. And for that, I am beyond grateful!

Know that no matter what you are going through there is always help to be given. Suicide may seem like the only outcome when the darkness overtakes you, but I am here to tell you that it's not. There is always a beam of light waiting to take hold and bring you out of whatever darkness you may feel trapped in!

* * *

Do You?


Do you feel that?

The warm liquid cascading down your arm?


I do.


It smells like iron.

Cascading down at such a rapid pace,

It drips down my fingertips onto the floor leaving droplets everywhere like breadcrumbs for someone to miraculously follow and maybe find me in time.


Do you taste that?

Horrid and blain.


I do.


The chalky texture touches my tongue and slides down my throat.

One by one sending me into a state of endless sleep.


Do you hear that?

The roar of the nearby siren?


I don't.


For when it finally comes to reach me it will be too late.

Maybe then you will realize just how much your words and actions truly affected me.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Lifestyle

Pros And Cons Of Having A Birthday Near The Holidays

The truth of what it is like having a birthday around the holiday season.

1753
Christmas decoration
Flickr

It's the most wonderful time of the year!! But for some people, including myself and my Dad, it can have its ups and downs when it comes to having a birthday near and around the holiday season. I personally share a birthday with my Dad two days before Christmas. Yes, Christmas Eve Eve is our birthday. Here are a few pros and cons for having a birthday near the holidays.

Keep Reading...Show less
Christmas Tree Lights
Pixabay

It is that time of year again. Christmastime. It is one of my favorite seasons for a myriad of reasons. Here are just a few reasons why I love Christmas. This list is in no order of importance.

1. The Christmas decorations

I am that person who will decorate directly after Thanksgiving is over. This year, my roommates and I put the tree up in our apartment before we even left for Thanksgiving break. It is a great stress reliever for me to just sit in my living room and work on the huge amount of work I have before the semester is over.

Keep Reading...Show less
girl with santa hat
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

'Tis the season to be jolly folks, and if you're anything like me, then at the stroke of midnight on Halloween your home went from wicked to winter

Keep Reading...Show less
mistake
Project Eve

Mistakes are something we all make, no matter how old we get. Most of the time, the mistakes we made are little and sometimes due to something out of our control. Yet, there are mistakes that are bigger than others. Personally, I have mistakes that I wish I could go back and undo. Here they are:

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

5 Things To Do That Are Better Than Writing A Paper

Don't waste your time trying to write that paper when there are so many more interesting things you could be doing.

13203
computer keyboard
Unsplash

Writing a paper is never fun and is rarely rewarding. The writer's block, the page requirement, be specific, but don’t summarize, make sure you fixed any grammatical errors, did you even use spellcheck? and analyze, analyze, analyze.

Papers can be a major pain. They take up so much time and effort that by the end of the process you hate yourself and you hate the professor for making life so difficult. Questions of your existence start roaming in your mind. Am I even cut out for college if I can’t write a single paper? Am I even capable of taking care of myself if I lack the energy to open my laptop and start typing?

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments