Studying for the MCAT is hard at any point. You are expected to know seven subjects - biology, chemistry, physics, biochemistry, critical reading, psychology, and sociology - and have the stamina to sit through a 7 hour (now 5 hour and 45 minute) exam. It is seriously no joke.

But I had to do it in the middle of a pandemic.

My initial thought was that I would have nothing better to do than to study because we were in quarantine. And I was right. Too right. For the first three months of my studying regimen, I literally couldn't do anything but study and it drove me crazy. I was stuck in one room in my house, which I had not been in for such an extended period of time in two years, surrounded only by my family. It was incredibly taxing to my mental health and all I could think about was the MCAT. What if I fail? What if I never get into medical school? Should I even be pre-medicine?

I genuinely did not expect it to take such a toll on me. For my entire life, I have never been a person that stresses out about academics. School has always been something I had under control. Studying for the MCAT was different. It felt like everything was riding on this exam; that if I failed, my entire career would be over. Thinking like that but not being able to meet with friends as a coping mechanism was debilitating. One day in July, I seriously considered giving up because it felt like my studying was not getting me anywhere.

But then we could finally meet out friends. I finally realized how important it is to have a support system in situations like these. The relief that physically seeing my friends gave me caused me to renew my motivation. Once I started taking practice exams in August, I realized that I was on the right track and by the time I took my exam in September, I was relaxed and confident in myself.

The point of this isn't to talk about how to study for the MCAT, but how the process feels. The worst part about studying is not the content, but the stress that accompanies the weight of the exam. The most important part of the entire process is having a support system to remind you that the MCAT will not make or break your life. There is no harm in retaking it and there is no reason that you need the most perfect score to become a doctor. At the end of the day, what is most important is that you do the best of your abilities and you give it your all. Your effort will speak for itself.