Be an English major, they said. It’ll be fun, they said.

Okay, so maybe nobody really said that to you except yourself. You thought being an English major would be fun. Perhaps even easy. Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it isn’t.

No major is easy. But let’s face it: you did decide to become an English major because reading and writing excite you. And whether you see it now or not, all this writing and reading for school is going to pay off immensely.

That being said, I’ve noticed quite the trend recently in English majors so far this half of the semester. So whether you just started, started four years ago, or can’t even remember when you started, here’s a little something to keep you distracted even for a little while and hopefully make you laugh.

1. Reading the syllabus (i.e. looking at all the sh*t you gotta do…)

2. Workshops

3. Writing for said workshop

4. Essays

5. Reading for classes

6. Theory

7. IPA (if you don’t know what this is, thank your lucky freaking stars)

8. Re-writing after your workshop