Upon reading the title of this article you probably thought, "Wow, this guy meant to write ‘careless’ and instead wrote ‘carless.’ How ironic... this article will probably be rife with purposeful spelling errors as a joke." Well, careless as I may be, you’re wrong. This is indeed about not having a car. Sure, it’s not so bad, you can walk to food from campus, and that’s all that really matters, right? But that's only half the struggle. Without a car...
1. You can’t go anywhere.
I’ll bet you’re the kind of college student that likes food. And as with everything else in life, all of the best restaurants are approximately way too far away to walk to. Well don’t worry, a short 10-minute jaunt in the car you don’t have will get you there. Yay!
2. You can’t go anywhere.
So you’re not a foodie, but you love music and living in LA is like living in a dream. Every major artist on every tour they’ve had has made a stop somewhere near here... perfect. Now all you have to do is flap your arms really hard and fly over there or the only concert you’ll be seeing is the live album on your iPhone you listen to on the way to class.
3. Did I mention you can’t go anywhere?
Alright, apparently I’m getting very out of touch with your reality or you’re an anomaly of a person who doesn’t like food or music. Well, whatever it is that your black soul derives joy from is probably also at a convenient driving distance, but guess what? If you said, “I can’t go anywhere,” you’re definitely getting the hang of this guessing thing, and if not, hang in there champ. You’ll get it next time.
4. You can’t get anywhere without Uber or Lyft, which are expensive.
Ok fine, I’ve been purposefully ignoring the fact that there are a plethora of transportation options other than driving your own car, including but not limited to: taking the bus, riding a train, owning a private jet that can land on residential streets, stealing your friend’s car, stealing a random person’s car, interstellar space travel, jetpack and of course, good old walking. If by some off-chance you can’t make any of those methods work, then you can always pay someone to take you pretty much anywhere. But considering it costs $20 to Uber anywhere outside of walking distance, you've sacrificed eating ramen noodles every day this week, or eating a Chipotle burrito one day and ramen the rest. And if you’re thinking, "I would never eat ramen, it’s not flavorful or nutritious enough," then I refer you back to point number 1, but as for me, I’ll be taking that burrito, and if I can avoid being so lazy that I actually walk to class instead of Uber for a day or two I might even be able to afford guac.
