Recently a problem was brought to my attention. In the college setting, no one is talking anymore. We walk into our classes, leave at least one seat between us and the person sitting by us, and then pick up our phones to avoid any eye contact. Why do we do this? Are we so insecure that we are afraid of failure of striking up a conversation with a fellow classmate? The same goes for on the bus, standing in lines, and sitting in the cafeteria. Its time to start talking!
Why is this a problem?
In order to head to college, most of us leave our families and friends for a place where we haven't lived before and know barely anyone. We are forced out of our comfort zones and often feel like an unimportant figure in a school thats bigger than we have ever experienced. So many students face homesickness, anxiety and loneliness because of the situation. But what if we could change this desperate feeling? I think that by talking to the person next to you, it could make someone feel important and noticed. We should be lifting each other up, as we are all in a similar situation. We should be bonding together and helping each other get through the homesickness that many of us experience.
How do we begin?
Talking, or even sitting next to, someone in class isn't easy because of a fear of rejection. You don't know what that person is thinking or if an attempt will end in an awkward exchange where the person really doesn't care to talk. But I have found that if you try, more often than not, you can make a connection that will change your day, and the person you are talking to.
What to say?
One of the main concerns of striking up a conversation with the person next to you is a matter of breaking the silence. How do you get someone to be comfortable enough to open up and make a connection? One of the greatest tips that I have been taught while at Utah State is that people like to talk about themselves, so don't make it about you. People love to be complimented, so tell them how cool their glasses are or ask them where they got their cool backpack.
What if that doesn't work?
Okay. So maybe you are nervous and can't think of anything to compliment them on. Try to find something you have in common. If you are sitting in a class, you already have something in common. THE CLASS! So ask how they are dealing with a hard assignment, and not only will you get some study tips for the class but they will also feel good because you went to them for help. This can lead to asking about how they have time for other classes, which could lead to what classes they are taking, which could lead to their major, which may be the same as yours and then all of a sudden you can't stop talking because of all the things you have in common! The most important tip when considering this idea is that you don't let the conversation die out. Its a lot easier to let the advice slide and then not say anything else.
Through the ability to speak to those around you, you may find friends in places you never expected and connections that may benefit you later in life. Not only this, but classes and campus life become a lot more enjoyable for everyone out there. So get out and strike up the conversation.
