"Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place." -- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
Compassion can often be deemed a "soft" attribute. A weakness. We are told that the world is a tough place and that we must harden ourselves in order to survive, but that thought is limiting. And wrong.
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Our cultural adverseness to emotion has become somewhat of a universal lesson. We deem crying as frailty. But why? Crying has always indicated that we are alive, that we feel.
There's this assumption that one can't be kind and fiery, that the two are somehow mutually exclusive -- that's not true. We are multi-faceted; we are not one emotion, one attribute, one story. Don't let anyone (especially your own self) put you in a box.
And besides, emotional people are tough as nails.
If you just scoffed at that, then I implore you to expand your perception of what it means to be tough.
I've always been emotional. Empathetic -- to a fault. I feel deeply. I used to hate this about myself. But as I aged (and cried and felt strongly about numerous things), I realized that to be open and, yes, overly-empathetic is to live a life without reserve. We experience it all; each emotion, thought and idea. Where's the weakness in that?
There is no shame in vulnerability, there is only strength.
The truth of the matter is that those who allow themselves to be vulnerable, who expose their tender underbelly to a harsh, scary world, exhibit far more strength and spirit than those who live in armor. Emotion is a demonstration of confidence and self-awareness.
People assume that by feigning a tough facade they will avoid pain and heartbreak. Sure, but there's a flip-side to that coin. Avoiding suffering may mean avoiding love and beauty.
Pain is inevitable, and the emotionally free are aware of this, but this does not stop them from loving, from connecting with the universe. They feel for people they've never met; they are attuned to the beauty around them.
It is easy to be callous. It takes true strength to be soft and kind, in spite of it all. Nathan Filer once wrote in his novel, The Shock of the Fall: "She has known sadness, and it has made her kind." And, to me, that is the epitome of resilience.
Your compassion makes you a warrior. Embrace it.
