We all have our types. You know what I’m talking about. Those people that make you stop what you’re doing and take your focus away from everything in hopes that you two lock eyes so they can see the “I’m your future wife! Stop walking away! I’m right here! HELLO!!! LOVE ME!” look you are so strongly giving them.
For me, my type can range from blue collar construction worker (yum), to the hot Antonio Brown look-a-likes I see at the gym (yes please!!), all the way to bald 40-year-old men (don’t judge me). The boy that let me get away was as blue collar as they come. I met him on my first night of an internship in an extremely fate-like way. My trusty drunk best friend of 10 years ran up to him and screamed, “YOU ARE SO HOT! YOU NEED TO DATE MY FRIEND,” and proceeded to put my number in his phone. After that night, we were stuck like glue. We had a summer straight out of “The Notebook."
After 2 months of bliss, my internship ended. I went back to college and left him in Alabama. We did long distance for the next 6 months and made it work, until reality sunk in. I wanted to apply for jobs all over the country, he wanted to stay in his small town. I wanted to take over the world, he was content being a small fish in a big pond. We had different goals, but we masked them with our innocent love as long as possible.
We ended up breaking up right after our 9 month anniversary and that began the longest 6+ months of getting over him and the routines we had created together. There were no more “good morning” and “goodnight” texts, no more “stop pooping, I miss you” GIFs and no more endings to hour long phone calls with “I love you to the moon and back."
A few weeks went by and he did what several guys have done before, but no ex-girlfriend wants to deal with. He sent the “I just want to let you know I am talking to someone” text (a week after we broke up. Ew). Then he would continuously apologize for hurting me, but when I tried to call and talk about things like adults, he would ghost me. Naïve and still fearlessly in love, I tried to fight and put myself out there in hopes he would magically become the Noah to my Allie and fight for me. Well, as my dad says, “people show their true colors during a breakup.” Remember that.
Fast forward a year and a half, another ex and I just broke up and as I like to say, “It was a moment of weakness.” I did what many people thinking about doing, but rarely do, I called my ex. We ended up talking and FaceTiming for 5 hours. He apologized for how he handled our breakup, and I apologized for my fair share of faults we had in our relationship. We promised to continue to talk and be friends with the mutual thought that we ended on a pause.
You would think that because the chemistry was still there, apologies had been exchanged, and we both said we wanted to try again to make it work that it would. SPOILER ALERT: it didn’t. The same thing happened, he was lazy, didn’t fight for me and tried to pretend that I didn’t know exactly what he was thinking. Again, this boy was letting me get away.
The end of us came, but I’m still here and I’m going to be okay. There is no more wondering what he is doing, did he ever change, is he more in love with someone else than he was with me or could we be soulmates? I am finally free and honestly, I am so excited for what is to come next.
If you are sitting wondering why he didn’t fight for you or why you weren’t enough, please stop. Understand that there is someone that will always fight for you and will tell you every day that you are more than enough. Love the man that let you get away for setting you free because I guarantee deep down you knew he wasn’t the right one either. You will move on, you will find the strength you didn’t know you had, and you will find peace in knowing that you will forever be the one HE let get away.
