Though I will agree with most readers that “hate” is a very harsh word, I feel it’s important to use this work in the points I’m about to make, because the words “aggressiveness,” “meanness,” or “rudeness” don’t quite get the message across.

I see hate all the time. Yet, more often, I see the cycle of hate. One person who is either being affected by the cycle that day, or for a long time now, tries to make someone feel exactly like they do. Whether it be hurt, sadness, or anger, the results are usually never good.

Most commonly, I would find these situations when I would work during the summer. Working in a customer service setting really allows you to experience the cycle of hate on a daily basis. Customers would come in angry, most times because someone else had made them angry throughout the day; their wife, a coworker, etc. By the end of their day, they usually were looking to pick a fight with anyone, and no matter how hard you tried, it would be you.

Now, this is how the cycle gets worse. Once you allow someone to affect the way you feel and become hateful as well, it begins to affect everyone else around you. All of a sudden, you went from fighting with a customer to saying a rude comment to your coworker. Your coworker goes home and is rude to her husband. Her husband gets annoyed at his children when they ask him to come play. The kids go to school and are rude to other kids, and the cycle continues over and over and over.

Stopping any kind of cycle happens when one part (or person) isn’t a part of it anymore. If you take out a link in a chain that makes a circle, it will eventually fall apart. Of course, there will be other cycles filled with other links and people, but at least you can have comfort in knowing you aren’t a part of them. However, in most situation, it’s hard to be the one who steps up and decides not to be affected. We’re only human, and, of course, things are going to make us upset, but we need to learn when our anger is being directed at those who never caused it in the first place. The whole “taking work home with us" attitude puts people in danger of losing the happiness in their home.

Social media is one of the most passive but effective kinds of cycles of hatred. People get in fights consistently with people from places they’ve never even heard of. And when all is said and done, both parties usually leave angry and have a bad rest of their day, all because of someone they’ve never even met.

At the end of the day, some people truly are hateful. No matter how good of a day they have or how nice people are, they will still be mean to those around them. But not everyone is that way. Many people are simply affected by those around them, and that’s because words are powerful. But just as words can be used to bring people down, they can also be used to bring people back up. Even small actions like a smile or a hug. Be kind, even when no one else is.