I realize the title sounds pretty extreme, but let me explain. I’m not talking about parents with overweight children who are generally concerned with their child’s health. I’m not talking about spouses, or parents, or struggling with diabetes, or high blood pressure that were caused by weight. I’m not talking about anyone who is actually concerned with someone’s health. I’m talking about all those people who are constantly slamming the body positivity movement, who are commenting nasty things any time they see a plus size model, and who for some reason always seem offended when they find a heavy person who is also confident. I am tired of these people saying “But obesity isn’t healthy! You’re just promoting an unhealthy lifestyle!”

Newflash, pal: you don’t actually care about anyone’s health.

Brief disclaimer: I use the word “fat” sometimes, never in a derogatory manner. It’s usually when I see a girl talking about her weight and someone else says, “You’re not fat; you’re beautiful.” I like to say, “You can be fat and beautiful!” Those two things do not have to be mutually exclusive! I’ve had several “fat” friends tell me they prefer this type of language, and that is why I use it. (If I ever personally offend someone by using this word, PLEASE let me know.)

With that being said, I LOVE seeing big girls (and guys!) flaunt their stuff! I love seeing big people happy and confident! We live in a society that is constantly telling girls to be thinner. Nearly every magazine is drastically photoshopped. Clothing sizes are growing smaller by the decade. So, I get really excited when I see someone breaking past all of that ugly stuff and still loving themselves. BUT THEN, at least once a day I see someone comment on someone’s selfie or make some hateful status about that’s “not healthy.”

I find it interesting that these people are SO concerned with some stranger’s health. I also find it interesting that they’re only concerned with the health of fat people. I see meme after meme about girls downing junk food all the time, and it’s “cute” and “trendy.” Just yesterday I saw a meme that said something along the lines of “Get you a girl that will eat a whole pizza in front of you” and all the comments were guys saying “Yeah I need me a girl like that.” You’re so concerned with health, but this is different for some reason?

Why does no one ever tell skinny girls they need to watch what they eat? I’ve always been on the thin side, for no other reason than I must have a crazy metabolism. I certainly do not eat healthy. I take personal offense to vegetables, I eat more candy than real food, and in high school I drank 6-8 cans of pop a day. Not once did someone ever tell me I was being unhealthy. Not once has someone tried to stop me or tell me I can’t feel good about myself. In fact, now that I’m trying to eat a little healthier, people will still offer me junk food or pop and if I say no they’ll say “You’re not on a diet are you?” or “You don’t think you’re fat, do you? Because you could stand to eat!” There it is! No one cares if I’m trying to eat healthy, they just care that I’m not fat.

Eating all that junk food has actually made me very unhealthy. I’m already starting to have serious issues with my sugar because of all the junk food I eat. I’m only 20. I can’t stand it when nobody says a thing to me about that but will bash a fat person who eats way healthier than I do and works out every day. Yes, obesity is scientifically linked to health problems but you also can’t base someone’s health solely off their appearance.

Even if you could, what do you accomplish by telling them they shouldn’t be confident the way they are? Do you think calling someone ugly is suddenly going inspire them? Do you think they only deserve to be happy if they’re “healthy?” Does that apply to anyone else? Are cancer patients allowed to be happy? Or are fat people the only ones who have to be miserable because of their “health?”

Think about these things the next time you see a plus size model or even someone on your friends list loving themselves. Think about why you’re so concerned with wanting someone else to be unhappy. Whatever you do, stop trying to say it’s because you care about their health. You don’t care about their health: physical, mental, or emotional. Admit it: you only care about you.