I'll admit it, in 2018, I checked up on a lot of people. Not directly, but through Instagram, Snapchat, and Facebook. I looked through their profiles, just to make sure that they were doing okay, that they were happy and healthy, as if social media truly depicts how someone's life is going. These people were mainly old friends, friends I haven't talked to in years, friends who I have very in-depth reasons for not having in my life anymore. Still, I'm an overly caring person, or maybe I'm just a curious person. Either way, I've come to realize this behavior is unhealthy.
Why is this unhealthy? Because you're reliving old pain. You're obsessing over someone else's life that hasn't been a part of yours in a long time. It's okay to be kind to them and to act civil with them, but that is the extent that your relationship with the person should go. Holding on to old pain, to old memories, can hinder your growth into a new person. You have to remember that you are not the person you once were, and they are not the person they were when you were friends with them.
People change. People evolve. People grow out of other people. This is something you must come to accept a million times over as your life progresses. Some people grow closer together, but others will grow apart. It is something out of our control, and the more we come to terms with that, the more room we have to mature into the best version of ourselves.
Here is my message to you, social media stalker. Unfollow. Block. Erase. Do whatever you need to do to distance yourself from your past life. It is pulling you back. Exit out of your Instagram app. Get off of Twitter. Call or text a current friend to spend some time with. Turn your phone off. Talk to the girl who sits next to you in class. Strike up a conversation with the boy standing in front of you in the Starbucks line. Create new bonds.
Most importantly, manifest a relationship within yourself. Learn how to be your own best friend. It is the most important, the most permanent relationship you will have throughout the span of your life. Don't grow apart from yourself. Grow with yourself. Find yourself. Love yourself. Most importantly, make sure the actions you make aren't keeping you from becoming the most healthy, happy version of you. You owe yourself that, at the very least.
