The first time I thought about the possibility of having a mental illness, I was twelve, drowning in the classic suckage of middle school, and heavily influenced by the blogging website Tumblr.com. I was sad, like regular puberty-sad. So, I told people that I was depressed. Years later, I would be diagnosed by a team of psychiatrists with bipolar disorder, but the time between deciding I was depressed and actually getting help were some of the worst I've ever been through.
I let my undiagnosed illness define me. I let the stigma of my depression, my undiagnosed depression, stop me from getting help with some growing, even more concerning symptoms - all because I decided, for myself, that I was depressed. Self-diagnosing mental illnesses is a hot topic, especially to those of us with professionally-diagnosed mental health problems of our own. But before you get defensive, what is "self-diagnosing" really, and what does it mean when you do it?
Self-diagnosing happens when someone looks at themselves and their behaviors and decides that they have a mental illness, without the help of a professional, such as a psychiatrist. The example I am going to use for this article is bipolar disorder. Self-diagnosing bipolar disorder occurs when someone notices cycles of deep sadness, followed by extreme energy, followed by more sadness, and so on. They then take these observations and think to themselves, "I might be bipolar." That thought turns to "I am bipolar." And then they refer to themselves as bipolar.
This is a self-diagnosis. This is also wrong.
It is okay to observe symptoms of mental illness in your own behavior. In fact, it is even a good thing. Whether it be in physical or mental health, it's important to be aware of your body, so you are aware of when you need to get help with something. It's okay to think "wow, I've been having a lot of ups and downs lately." But that thought should not be followed by "I have bipolar disorder." That thought should be followed by "Maybe I should see a psychiatrist to figure this out."
What do you even do with a self-diagnosis? You can't get medicine for it. Any therapist worth their salt would refer you to a psychiatrist instead of encouraging you to believe that you have a mental illness.
Claiming to have a mental illness, such as bipolar disorder, when you've never talked to a professional about how you're feeling actually discredits the people that actually have the illness. You might be right when you say you have a mental illness, but you might also not really know what you're talking about. I was wrong to self-diagnose because it kept me from getting the help I needed.
Don't decide for yourself whether or not you have a mental illness; explain your symptoms to a mental health professional and see what insight they have to offer.
