With the beginning of a new year, people feel the need to remake themselves. Diet fads, exercise plans, and other goals are all the talk. I once fell victim to the "new year new me" sentiment- I would vow to eat completely clean, workout, get perfect grades, and so forth. Lately, I've noticed all the flaws that come with the idea of completely reinventing yourself.
Firstly, you can not completely change who you are. Through nature and through nurture, you have become the person that you are. You may idolize those who are wildly successful and wealthy, but you are not them. Oftentimes, we see those who are successful as having a perfect, happy life and if we copy what they do/ say, we too can achieve this perfect life. This, however, is not reality. You are not ever going to become a replica of them, no matter how hard you try. Instead of vowing to be your idols, vow to work your hardest to be as successful as your idols. And stop idolizing them, if you idolize them then you see their status as something you can never achieve. Rather, respect them- for the most part, they have worked incredibly hard to get to the position they are at.
We often focus on our flaws to the extent that sometimes we forget our good parts. Wanting to completely remodel the person you are is an act of self-deprecation. Stop wanting for a "new you". Instead, strive for self improvement. Strive for it everyday and not just the month of January. Don't just make your goals about changing your physical appearance, create goals that embody self love and depth. And please, stop thinking that you're going to completely change yourself over night. Someone once told me to look at things as a process and not an event. Well, self growth is a process, not an event. It's going to take you to desire to be a better person and actively work towards that goal every single day.
Setting up these lofty goals is just setting yourself up for failure. By all means, create an ideal self and strive to reach it. However, don't be completely unreasonable. Break up your goals into pieces, you're not going to win a Nobel peace prize in a day- but you can hold the door open for that person walking behind you. Also, stop punishing yourself for slip ups- we are all human and therefore we can't be perfect 24/7. As long as you are working your best to be the person you want to be, you should feel accomplishment in that fact.
One last thing, why do you wait until January 1st to improve yourself? You can start right now. It doesn't matter what happened last week, yesterday, or even a couple of seconds ago. You have the opportunity to take the moment that you are present in and vow to be the best you that you can possibly be. Why is the change of the calendar year such a monumental time to remake yourself? Take advantage of now, stop delaying.
And for goodness' sake, stop saying "new year, new me".