How many times have you seen an article or read something somewhere about praying for the perfect husband?
I'm completely guilty. So many times we look for traits in other people but we forgot to take a look at ourselves. Sure we need to be patient while waiting, but in the meantime, we should be working on ourselves. Somewhere out in the world, there's a guy praying for the perfect wife while you're sitting here praying for the perfect husband.
Do you remember all the qualities that you wished for in a companion? Now let's swap it and work on these things in ourselves. It's important for a wife to be honest. I believe honesty is one if not the most important traits in a relationship. If you can't trust your spouse, or they can't trust you, nothing good can come from that. It will be a constant battle of wondering if you're being told the truth or not. On substantial issues like infidelity or finances, it's important to not even have to think twice that your partner is cheating or scamming you.
Along with that, respecting your partner is equally as important and goes hand-in-hand with honesty. The Merriam-Webster dictionary definition of respect states:
"a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements"
We were having a discussion in my writing 202 class the other day about relationships and stay-at-home parents. A little off-topic, but a great discussion. Something my professor said that really stuck with me is her one piece of relationship advice. She said something along the lines that a successful relationship will always require that each individual feels extremely lucky to have the other as their spouse. Once you don't feel lucky and hold something against the other such as "You're lucky I'm working my butt off so we can afford this house" or "You're lucky I stay at home with the kids", your relationship is in a downward spiral. You should always be working on yourself so that your spouse feels lucky to have you, and vice versa.
All of the qualities I've listed so far are great and all, but before any of these can happen, you just need to be happy. No one wants to be with a miserable scrooge. When you're happy, you bring happiness unto others. I think we should work to build a life for ourselves where we are undeniably happy, not just content. For me, I believe I'll be happy once I'm set in a career that I love. Once I accomplish that, I'll be able to give my very best, happy self to someone else and start a family. This could be different for each individual, but whatever it is, do it. Make yourself happy before you make anyone else happy.
In order to find the "perfect husband", I feel it's important that we make ourselves the "perfect wife." Whatever qualities you're looking for in a spouse, embrace those within yourself. Figure out what you want to accomplish in your lifetime, set goals, have dreams, but always be working to be the best self that you can be so that your spouse feels so lucky to have you.
