If you’re anything like me, you grew up dreaming about what your wedding day would be like. Maybe you and your friends would talk about what color your bridesmaids would wear or how you wanted to tie the knot with your toes in the sand.
Whether you’re single or in a committed relationship, if you’re a Pinterest user, chances are you have a wedding board. “Wedding Ideas,” “Happily Ever After,” whatever you call it, that board is filled with stunning photos of white dresses, giant diamond rings, flowers, and more. You probably have every aspect of your wedding planned out on that thing.
I get it. It’s hard to avoid falling down the Pinterest wedding rabbit hole. For the last few years I’ve been dating an absolutely amazing person, which means marriage has become a tangible possibility (whenever timing and finances are right). Add in the fact that so many people I know are getting engaged or married, and it’s become insanely difficult not to scroll through wedding pins.
Whenever I get into a Pinterest frenzy, I have to remind myself to pump the brakes. Because planning out a dream wedding, especially when you’re planning long before there’s even a ring on your finger, can cause a few issues.
1. It creates unrealistic expectations.
I feel like there was probably much less pressure on brides-to-be before Pinterest. The site is great for bits of inspiration, but it also makes it easy to cross the line into jealousy and outlandish expectations for what your wedding should look like.
The wedding pictures you see on Pinterest probably took a whole lot of preparation and money, which means striving for that “Pinterest-worthy” wedding is going to take a lot of preparation and money. Yes, you want your day to be beautiful, but don’t hold yourself to a standard that might be beyond your means.
2. It makes it hard to trust your instincts.
You know yourself pretty well. And when it comes time to get married, you’ll know your future spouse pretty well, too (well...hopefully). So, when the wedding day arrives, it should be a reflection of you and your spouse’s tastes and personalities. If we rely on Pinterest to see what’s “in”, it can cause us to question our personal wants and tastes. Go with your gut and focus on making your wedding day yours.
3. It distracts from the now.
This really could be said for Pinterest in general but I feel like this is super important when it comes to wedding planning. If you’re in a relationship, you’re in an important season where you can strengthen your relationship and work tirelessly on getting to know each other better. If you’re single, you have a beautiful opportunity for self discovery and personal growth. Don't waste those opportunities by constantly daydreaming or trying to plan out some larger-than-life wedding. The best piece of wedding inspiration I’ve received is this:
Focus on what you want to look like on the inside on your wedding day.
Meaning, before you start pinning dress after dress, maybe turn your focus to working through self doubts, anxieties and insecurities. This way, when you walk down the isle you can be confident you’re entering into marriage as one of the best versions of yourself.
With all that being said, Pinterest can be an incredible planning tool, but its important for us to remind ourselves to use it solely for inspiration. Ideas to take and make our own. Not guidelines, not expectations that must be met.