Forty-one percent of first marriages end in divorce. In America, someone gets divorced approximately every 36 seconds. Here’s the statistic that really hits right in the heart though, half of all American children will witness the divorce of a parent’s marriage. Compared to children who have experienced a death in the family, children of divorce experience more psychological problems. The heartbreaking statistics on the effects of divorce on children is enough to make anyone cringe.

The day that someone decides to become a parent their life is no longer about them. Becoming a parent means devoting and dedicating yourself to your child. My parents always put my happiness before their own because they feel that is what it means to be a parent.

In today’s society some people seem to take having a child, creating a life, being a parent and marriage to be a lot less significant than it should be. Let’s start with marriage because it all really comes down to that. Marriage is supposed to be a sacred vow. Anyone can attest to the fact that being given someone’s word doesn’t mean anything. Just because someone swears to it, or promises. Those are just words now, it’s sad but true. People’s honor used to mean something to them. A vow used to be significant. Now, marriage vows are made and broken as if they were magazine subscriptions.

Maybe I’m old fashion but I believe if you loved someone enough to vow to spend your whole life with them, then it should be worth it to put in the extra effort to rekindle that love. In cases of adultery or abuse the safest decision is to leave the abusive partner. People get divorced for much more juvenile reasons though. They’re too stressed, not getting along, lost the flame and more. All of these small issues end up breaking marriages, families, homes, and hearts. Out of all marriages in the US, half will end in divorce.

Sometimes, it’s the fact that the marriage never should have happened in the first place. Someone got pregnant and felt marriage was the right move. A drunk night led to a spontaneous wedding. A young couple thought they were ready when they really weren’t. None of these things sound all too bad until you add kids into the equation. As I said earlier, once you have kids, all of your decisions are no longer about you.

Children become emotionally traumatized watching their parents go through a divorce. Their chances of having healthy relationships in the future decreases. As young children, their behavior changes in such a way that it is extremely noticeable they have gone through a trauma.

Maybe our society will never be able to come back from what normalizing divorce has done. Maybe we will never be able to take the marriage vows seriously ever again. But what’s more important than keeping a vow you made to the person you love? Keeping that vow despite feeling a lack of love, and doing so because you both share a common love for a small human who you gave life to. So let’s stop normalizing divorce, for the sake of the children.