On July 30, 2016, an unfortunate and heartbreaking event happened in a town near my home. It was another shooting, may I add. A girl of the young age of nineteen was shot and killed by her ex-boyfriend due to jealousy. Two of her friends were shot and killed as well, with another injured. An act of a single man has wounded and scarred the families of these innocent people and the town of Mukilteo, Washington itself. All due to the girl breaking up with her boyfriend. Because he lost his “dream girl.” Because he did not have enough respect for her to take no for an answer.
On June 18, 2016, a mother was shot and killed in her own home by her ex-boyfriend in Washington DC. After being harassed and threatened multiple times, she reached out to the police and even got a restraining order. However, the restraining order was not enough for the ex-boyfriend to accept the “no.”
These events not only shine a light on domestic violence and gun control, but it proves that events like these are reasons why saying “no” is not so easy anymore. This is all due to toxic masculinity and male entitlement over women and their sexuality. Although I am not accusing all men of having this trait, statistics show that 40% of mass shootings in the United States have happened with a current or former significant other being the main target. What is even worse is that 70% of victims killed by a current or former intimate partner are women.
When someone says “no,” it is not a request. No means no and that is it. It does not matter if they seem unsure for the tone of their voice does not matter. If they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol, then that is a definite no. We need to stop making this two letter word so complex because there is only one meaning to it and it should not be confusing.
Women should not have to live in fear of being hurt just by saying no. Women should not have to say yes because they fear for their life if they were to say no. A relationship is a two-way street and once one way reaches a dead end, it is no longer a relationship. Women are hurting, dying and struggling because of domestic violence and abuse. They are unable to leave the situation because they aren’t being respected or taken seriously. No one wishes to be in an abusive relationship, so why do 1 in 10 women end up in one?
Many people seem to forget that honor killings are still prevalent today. In countries such as India and Pakistan, 2,000 women are killed every single year to “restore” or “keep” the family’s honor. This isn’t a governmental or religious issue anymore; it is the inferior view of females due to cultural conceptions.
Almost every single woman has experienced a form of harassment. Whether it be sexual abuse or catcalling or street harassment, women experience it and women do not like it. Enough is enough.
