Don’t find the guy, be the girl.

Scrolling through social media, we are bombarded with articles telling us to “find the guy who…”.

“Find the guy who kisses your forehead.”

“Find the guy who treats you like a princess.”

“Find the guy who will drop everything for you.”

Blah, blah, blah. What doesn’t make sense is why society is telling us to look for guys who possess these random qualities like we are entitled to an amazing guy. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say eff that. Eff finding ‘the guy who’.

Relationships, in my eyes, are about finding someone special enough so share your life with, and to share in each other's joys and sorrows along the way. Who give a flying frick if he isn’t a sappy article come to life. Just as well, relationships aren’t found-- they happen. Searching for “the guy who” seems like it will lead a person to search for love in people they won’t find it with. Love is not something that can be synthesized, just because we want it.

So why do all these articles and posts talk about “the guy who”? Well, who cares, let’s change that. Instead of looking for “the guy who,” learn to be “the girl who.” Be the girl who is deserving because she puts in the effort. Be the girl who is selfless, and kind under any circumstance. Be the girl who knows her worth. Be the girl who loves herself even on her worst days. Be the girl is open to receive love not because she thinks she deserves it or is lonely, but because she knows she has so much to give.

Calling someone your significant other should not be based on petty actions, or the belief they

need

to do certain things to be worthy. We are worthy of the equivalent of ourselves.

I believe the day we stop viewing relationships as one parties job to do certain things, is the day someone meaningful will enter our lives. Stop being the girl who is upset because no guy seems to fit the bill. Stop being dependent on someone else being the right fit for you, and trust that you're right for someone else. Start being the girl that “the guy who” will be grateful to spend time with. Be the girl you picture “the guy who” being with. You are capable, and you are enough. Now prove first to yourself, and then to him that you ARE “the girl who.”