In my freshman year of college, instead of gaining the freshman fifteen, I lost it. Upon returning home, family and friends noticed I was down a few pounds and began to tell me that I looked really good, had lost a lot of weight, and that I was skinny. The more people spoke about my weight loss, the worse I felt. Ironic, isn't it?
My problem was not that people were trying to compliment my appearance, I mean don't get me wrong I appreciated it, it was that the word skinny was being used as a compliment. People were pointing out my weight loss as a positive, important feature that I possessed. Skinny: a word that not only says absolutely nothing about a person’s character or their contributions to the world around them, but is also prominently used in today’s society, can be very toxic when used.
Many do not realize the implications that come with the word skinny, and while I by no means am an expert in this field, personally, by calling someone skinny, you're telling them that they look better at a lower weight and that the person’s lower weight is an achievement worthy of praise. Weight loss is seen as a great thing, even if the person lost the weight in an extremely unhealthy way. Who knows if someone has lost weight because of healthier eating habits or because they skip meals? Some may ask “Well, if I look skinny now was I fat previously?” while others may allow the comment to latch onto and feed off of insecurities they have with their bodies. Hearing that I look skinny when I do not typically categorize myself as a skinny person made me feel the need to count my calories and skip dessert so I could continue to “look good” to others. I understand the opinions of others are less important than how I feel about myself, but it can be very unsettling to hear the words “You look skinny.”
I know change doesn’t happen overnight, but it is important that we begin to change how we view a person. Instead of calling a person skinny, which most of us have probably done, we should think of ways to compliment the features of a person’s true self like their personality and passions. Try telling someone you admire how kind he or she is towards others or that you appreciate their knowledge of every single detail in Game of Thrones, because as many may say, it's not the number on the scale that matters, it's what’s on the inside that does.