I've played sports my entire life, from baseball to karate to wrestling to softball, you name it, I have probably played it. During my time with each of these sports, team chemistry and the relationship between athlete and coach differs. I would say that several factors influence that. First of all gender, while I was always the only girl on all the boys teams I played on, these teams were honestly my favorite, I played on the boys teams all the way up until freshman year of high school, and I loved it, they generally accepted me, and in many situations protected me and stood up for, especially my coaches.
Growing up in sports on the boys teams was the best decision I ever made, it taught me several valuable lessons, but the most important thing it taught me was to be tough, and to not blame my inabilities on my coach. Now at almost 21 years of age, playing Division I girls softball, the difference between girls and coaches and boys and coaches is something I think about all too often.
Starting in high school softball, the first time I joined an all girls team, there was a noticeable difference between those who grew up playing against the boys and those who didn't, these kids were generally more aggressive and had sharper overall skills, this doesn't mean that those who played with the girls growing up weren't good, but there is a difference in the athlete that is produced. But what really bothered me was the way that kids began to talk about their coaches.
It was definitely a problem in high school and is unfortunately still occasionally an issue in college. Some people seem to forget that playing time is a product of hard work, dedication, and talent. Only so many people can start each game, in terms of my sport softball, the best 9 or 10 are in that starting lineup, that is what the coach has to do in order to win, because in college the coaches career is controlled by the wins and the losses. What I can no longer stand listening to is people blaming their coaches for everything. Players will say things such as "well coach never works with me" "Coach hates me" "that girl is coaches favorite so I'll never play over her" or my personal favorite is things like "I hate coach" "Coach picks favorite". Here is a little news flash and harsh truth for everyone out there.
STOP BLAMING YOU'RE COACH! If your are not in the starting lineup, do something to change it, work on your own put in the time and the over time, those starting ahead of you didn't get where they are overnight. Your coach does not hate you, your coach is not going to work one on one with you unless you ask, all though it may seem like it sometimes they can, they cannot read your minds. To be even more brutally honest, yea coaches do probably show more "favoritism" to those starters that bust their ass day in and day out for the betterment of the team, so stop hating your coach and the so-called favorites, get off your ass and change it.
To all my past and present coaches, Thank you from the bottom of my heart for teaching me that there is absolutely no substitute for hard work, that being the best is not for the faint of heart, and that no position is guaranteed and you have to practice everyday as if your position is on the line, because it is.
