I have the fear that my Grandma could be beaten up by this bully called Cancer!
I remember how scared I was when my aunt told me that my Grandma had been diagnosed with stomach cancer month ago the first time during my summer internship at the University of Pittsburgh. Thoughts like, “What could she have done differently?” and “Is she okay?” flew through my mind. This is the first time cancer has come into my world. Scary things have happened in my life, but Cancer struck me as being so very terrifying. I hated feeling like someone I love was going through something so awful. Learning more about what would heal my Grandma really helped ease my fears of losing her.
Chemotherapy and radiation treatment facts made me really troublesome. How was my Grandma supposed to get better, when the Chemotherapy was attacking her good cells, not just her bad? In the last week I have been by her side as she goes through treatment. The pain of seeing my grandmother on the chair with her face expression hurts me inside. The process of the treatment for some cancer patients is long and for some there are days it’s even longer.
Today is one of those days, she needed a lot of rest. In the last two weeks I have been with her, I’ve notice how careful she felt she had to be around me and ask to do something for her. She told me that she felt as a burden to the family and for us to deal with her condition. I had to explain to her that whatever it takes the family is here to support you and that we are all in this together, you and I especially. Even though she was not feeling okay, she still managed to get up every day and spend some time with me. I told her as I reminisce the past year of her home cooked meal when I would come home from school However, the roles have changed, with her condition she cannot cook anymore. Now I am cooking her meals. If you thought about it yes! It is really interesting how things can change in just one year.
Despite the pain and suffering she is going through at the moment, she is still my inspiration to be great. She understands perseverance and the importance of people. She carried on against all odds. When we had a conversation about life and the struggle, she knew exactly who I was, despite the two months the last times we had seen each other. In between those months she developed cancer, a cancer that she would never be told about. She lost a lot of weight, lost her appetite in eating, feeling nausea, and more. Both of her hands, which had always felt strong now feels frail and weak, as they had always looked. She would gratefully and respectfully refuse food. Often, she would not be strong enough to get out of bed or sit up.
Something that I recently learned is that great women in our lives don’t have to be celebrities to make an impact. It is through them, and their personal stories and struggles, that we create a legacy that fosters wonderfully, intelligent and passionate about life.
I see my grandmother every day. I see her in me and in the mirror. She lives with me, inside me, and in the legacies that I will create. And I know, she will be proud of me.
To be Continued…