Act II of Hamilton destroys your heart. This is just a statement of fact. Act I makes us love Alexander and Act II tests that love and punishes us for it. But Act II also has some of the best lines of the entire show. So here are the 34 best lyrics from Act II of Hamilton.
1. I've been in Paris meeting lots of different ladies / I guess I basic'lly missed the late eighties.
--What'd I Miss
What better way to introduce Thomas Jefferson?
2. Don't tax the South cuz we got it made in the shade.
--Cabinet Battle #1
3. Look, when Britian taxed our tea, we got frisky / Imagaine what don' happen when you try to tax our whisky.
--Cabinet Battle #1
4. A civics lesson from a slaver / Hey neighbor, your debts are paid cuz you don't pay for your labor / "We plant seeds in the South. We create." / Yeah, keep ranting, we know who's really doing the planting.
--Cabinet Battle #1
5. "My dearest Angelica" / With a comma after "dearest" / You've written "My dearest, Angelica."
--Take A Break
The original sexting.
6. Angelica, tell my wife John Adams doesn't have a real job anyway.
--Take A Break
7. Lord, show me how to say no to this / I don't know how to say no to this / But my God, she looks so helpless / And her body's saying "hell, yes".
--Say No To This
8. You see, that was my wife who you decided to / Fuuuu / Uh-oh! You made the wrong sucker a cuckold.
--Say No To This
9. Two Virginians and an immigrant walk into a room / Diametric'ly opposed, foes / They emerge with a compromise, having opened doors that were previously closed, Bros.
--The Room Where it Happens
Leave it to Lin to somehow get both "Diametrically" and "Bros" in the same verse.
10. God help and forgive me, I wanna build something that's gonna outlive me.
--The Room Where it Happens
11. I swear your pride will be the death of us all / Beware, it goeth before the fall.
--Schuyler Defeated
12. Smells like new money, dresses like fake royalty.
--Cabniet Battle #2
That's funny coming from a guy who dresses like this:
13."Should we honor our treaty, King Louis' head?" / "Uh...do whatever you want, I'm super dead."
--Cabinet Battle #2
Same King Louis, same, man.
14. Southern motherfuckin' Democratic-Republicans!
--Washington On Your Side
The only time being a Democratic-Republican ever was or sounded cool.
15. "Everyone shall sit under their own vine and fig tree / And no one shall make them afraid."
--One Last Time
And this is one of the best things about Hamilton; it can go from lyrics like number 14 to quoting scripture in the next song.
16. Jesus Christ, this will be fun
--I Know Him.
Ugh, I love sassy King George.
17. Sit down, John, you fat mother--[BEEP]
--The Adams Administration
18. An immigrant embezzling our government funds / I can almost see the headline, your career is done.
--We Know
19. I picked up a pen, I wrote my own deliverance
--Hurricane
20. Well, he's never gon' be President now/
--The Reynolds Pamphlet
This song is just full of amazing moments. Like this:
And this:
21. "You have married an Icarus, He has flown to close too the sun."
--Burn
22. I'm erasing myself from the narrative.
--Burn
The thing about Hamilton is that it spends the first half of the play making you fall in love with Alexander, and then it spends the second half crushing your heart.
23. Everything is legal in New Jersey...
--Blow Us All Away
24. If you see him in the street, walking by Himself, talking to himself, have pity / He is working through the unimaginable.
--It's Quiet Uptown
25. Forgiveness. Can you imagine?
--It's Quiet Uptown
Fair warning, do not listen to this song in public. It will destroy you and you will cry.
26. It's eighteen hundred, ladies, tell your husbands: vote for Burr!
--The Election of 1800
27. But when all is said and all is done, Jefferson has beliefs. Burr has none.
--The Election of 1800
I guess that's what you get when you always "talk less and smile more".
28. Here's an itemized list of thirty years of disagreements.
--Your Obedient Servant
DAMN.
29. Then stand, Alexander / Weehawken. Dawn. Guns. Drawn.
--Your Obedient Servant
30. Best of wives and best of women.
--Best of Wives and Best of Women
Do yourself a favor, and do some research on this quote. Alexander Hamilton and Eliza Schuyler, despite all of their problems, loved each other so deeply.
31. Hamilton was wearing his glasses / Why? If not to take deadly aim? / It's him or me, the world will never be the same / I had only one thought before the slaughter: / This man will not make an orphan of my daughter.
--The World Was Wide Enough
32. America, you great unfinished symphony, you sent for me / You let me make a difference / A place where even orphan immigrants / Can leave their fingerprints and rise up.
--The World Was Wide Enough
If there was one person who really lived the "American Dream" it was Alexander Hamilton, and God Bless that Trump wasn't around back then to stop him. (But, also if Trump was around back then no one would take him seriously and Alexander would have obliterated him in a pamphlet.)
33. You have no control: who lives, who dies, who tells your story?
--Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story
35. Ever other founding father story gets told / Every other founding father gets to grow old / But when you're gone, who remembers your name? / Who keeps your flame?
--Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story
34. Oh. Can i show you what I'm proudest of? / The orphanage.
--Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story
TEARS. She wrote herself back into the narrative!
The best ending to a musical ever.
