This is the sequel to, "11 Stereotypes of College Rodeo Kids." From bull riders to goat tyers, we all have our quirks. And as a collective, we have some pretty funny stereotypes. Here goes part two.
1. We’re rich.
People always look at me and say "Oh, your family must be *insert lucrative profession here*." I smirk and say, "Nope!" They stare at me wondering how to phrase the next question best. “You must have a lot of money, huh?” I smile and in a sing-songy voice say, “Just because we spend a lot of money, doesn’t mean we have a lot of money.” And with a flip of my hair —t hat is, if I wasn’t wearing a ball cap to mask the fact that I hadn’t showered and had just finished chasing a pen of steers — I stride away.
2. Calf ropers have fast hands and daddies better lock up their daughters.
We've all heard the announcer say it during a rodeo performance, but cowboys, we were checking out your horse. Let's be honest, calf ropers are always getting off their horses. If I had a good looking horse like that I'd never get off. Or would I?
3. Penniless roughies.
They don’t even have enough money to drive to the rodeo. But, you know, it's not fair to pin this one down on them. I know we're all a little jealous that they can hitchhike their way to a performance while we're loaded down with a living quarters trailer, six horses and a pickup running on fumes.
4. Sibling/buddy competitors are the worst.
You know who they are. You have to pause the high school rodeo because the split arena has calf roping and pole bending at the same time and the poor horse runs both events. Not to mention at the college rodeos where you have to switch stirrups so that the next person can jump on. Funny how they always draw up so close to each other in every performance.
5. Fair Weather Cowboys.
Maybe you shouldn’t buy the white splint boots and should save your nice cowboy hat for weddings. Because if there’s a rodeo, there will be rain. And team ropers, maybe you should be more concerned with watering your horse instead of the mud that just ruined your new pair of bell boots.
6. Barrel racers can’t ride.
As much as we would all like to believe this, barrel racing well is hard to do. Buying a nice horse that does all the work can make it much easier. That goes for any event. We all know the head horse that gives you the consistent perfect shot or the calf horse that works a the rope just right. Although, I would like to see a barrel racing challenge that each competitor draws a horse, a random one, and has to make a run on that horse. Just saying.
7. Goat tyers and their horses.
We all do appreciate the victory lap your horse does during your run and many seconds after your run, but seriously, can you get a less conceited horse? Thanks.
8. Bull riders only last eight seconds.
Technically that's how long they're supposed to last.
9. Steer wrestling horses are worse than barrel horses.
Hey, at least a barrel horse will turn. However, I can't say steer wrestlers don't have moves. Gotta love the happy dance they make after a smokin' run.
10. The phrase, "rope like a girl."
Well, I can tell you that I strive to be as handy as most of the female ropers I know. That saying is so outdated.
11. Heelers always have a rope in their hand.
You can usually sense a heeler is close by based on the consecutive whacks administered in the region of your ankles.
12. Headers and their "Hold my beer and watch this" attitude.
They back into the box and say, "One swing and I'm goin' left." Thanks headers, your heelers appreciate you.
13. The notorious, “If I hadn’t” statement.
Now, this goes for every event. "If I hadn't hit three barrels and broke the pattern, I would have been a 16 flat." "If I hadn't broke the barrier and waved it off, we would have won fast time." And so on. You know what I'm talking about.
These stereotypes, while not always accurate, do produce a little laughter. Here's to rodeo and long live cowboys!