The attack on an Orlando gay club Pulse is not the first act of terrorism against the LGBTQIA+ community. However, it is the largest mass shooting in the modern history of the United States, a nation in which there are more mass shootings than any other. It is simply unfathomable to think about the trauma that has come upon those at Pulse and in the Orlando area, yet we can see how it affects the community as a whole.

This time last year, the LGBTQIA+ community was celebrating marriage equality, now they are mourning the loss of over 50 of their siblings.

As media focuses on the shooter’s ties to terrorist group, his home-grown brand of terrorism is just that. While many are ignoring the blatancy of the hate crime this man committed. He did not have to go abroad or get outside influence to form this senseless hatred. He learned this hatred and bigotry right in the great U.S. of A.

As we learn more about the shooting and shooter the debates continue on motive and the availability of weapons such as the AR-15. While the availability of things such as this murder machine, and other automatic or semi-automatic weapons, is certainly a contributing factor that needs to be addressed, the focus of this is the pure hatefulness towards the LGBTQIA+ community which led to their murders.

One of the most disturbing developments to come out of this attack is the American public’s willingness to shift the focus off of the true motive to fit a narrative. The focus on Omar Mateen’s possible ties to radical Islamic groups shifts the blame from homophobia to the current scapegoat of our society, practitioners of Islam. News about his proposed ties to ISIL or even Hezbollah (which are two very contradictory groups of which to claim membership), before proof could be provided were spewed over every channel. While the clear motive of murdering queer people was pushed aside and left to speculation despite the target being a Gay nightclub, founded in memory of the owner’s brother, whom she lost to AIDS.

Omar Mateen’s sexual orientation does not magically change this massacre from a hate crime to some form of fanaticized “minority on minority shooting.” Even if Mateen was gay, bi, whatever, his murder of 50 innocent people and injury of 53 more based solely on the fact that they were at a GAY nightclub is what makes this a hate crime. His form of extremism is not learned in a foreign country, it is fostered in the country of his birth, the United States. The hateful rhetoric spewed by conservative Christians and politicians is something queer individuals deal with on a daily basis. Had he been gay, his internalized hatred is not new to the community. Many individuals, thanks to the external perceptions of LGBTQIA+ individuals, deal with an unrivaled sense of internalized self-hatred that takes years to overcome. This amazing community not only deals with outside prejudice, but self-acceptance as well. Mateen’s attendance at gay clubs, and presence on a gay dating app are not signifiers of a disgruntled queer individual with a vendetta, due to the disturbing “effectiveness” of his rampage it is likely he only attended these queer spaces, designed specifically to welcome anyone, only to scope out and plan his brutality.

We need to keep the focus on the loss of queer life. The greatest massacre of queer individuals since the 1973 Arson attack of a gay space in New Orleans, the UpStairs Lounge, which claimed the lives of 32 people, and the most visible attack since the brutal murder of Matthew Shepard in 1998. One of the most moving pieces I’ve seen floating around social media is a series of tweets by @fuzzlaw, who describes herself as “an aging dyke.” This thread focuses on the reactions of the older queer community, and their outrage, and lack of surprise, that this type of attack is still occuring in 2016.

Though the community has come so far since its first “Pride,” the riots at Stonewall, marriage equality did not signify the end of their fight. Awareness of the types of radicalism bread by hateful American rhetoric needs to arise from this tragic loss of life.

To try and make some sense, perhaps give some understanding on the perspective of the community, I’ll conclude with a beautiful poem, written by an equally beautiful individual. Arden Colleluori published this poem on her Facebook the day the news broke about Orlando with two possible titles.

"I write this as my girlfriend sleeps next to me" or "I woke up at 4 AM with tears on my cheeks"

You can scream politics, shout over their dead bodies, but that won't bring them back

An entire community flinches from loss, but we're told to relax

"Maybe if you didn't ACT gay

you wouldn't be treated this way."

Okay.

If sapphic kisses arm women to the to the teeth,

then call me the fucking Lesbian War Chief.

If being queer or identifying with the LGB or T

suddenly gives us an army,

then why haven't we retaliated?

you make this so complicated

so

let me simplify this a bit:

You hate us because we're different.

It is YOU raising your hackles, YOU bristling your fur

it is YOU questioning "Oh geez would it be 'his' or 'hers'??

You hate us and beat us and kill us and damn us to hell

oh, it's because you want a Pride Parade as well?

Our first Pride had no rainbows, no glitter, nothing like that,

our first pride happened ironically at a gay bar and it was a fucking riot.

We got tired of hiding and finally fought back

with transwomen of color, brave sisters, leading the attack.

They got tired of being treated less than second class

so they matched the beatings they took and they really kicked ass.

If you want Straight Pride, I won't stop you, I won't fight,

but you've never had to debate if you deserved basic rights,

you've never been forced to put on a mask every day

(because people beat their kids if they "end up" transgender or gay.)

If you ask me, and I'm no expert just a pissed off queer with a poetic streak,

Straight Pride happens every day of every fucking week.

You can walk with each other, hand in hand

and not ONCE get asked "Well, who is the man?"

You can be a couple in public without feeling the blaze of a spotlight hiss

you can go to the bathroom undisturbed and take a nice long piss

and yeah it really seems like you guys have it bad, I'm sorry, kudos, you've been brave.

The gay community will help you celebrate after we finish digging their graves.

**The use of the term "queer" in this article is used interchangably with "LGBTQIA+" and not meant as a slur.