As a resident of Massachusetts, it is probable that you have or will utilize at least one of the several T-station lines that are running in and out of Boston. This seemingly complex system is a lifesaver for students, commuters, city-goers and anyone looking to go on trip to our beloved city. Through a kind and appreciative heart for the ability to use such transportation, I give you my personal thoughts while on the Red line one busy Wednesday morning.
1. OK, only a few people here. I have a seat. This is good.
2. All of the seats are gone. There are some people standing. I'm still breathing though. It's all good.
3. Slightly annoyed that I'm eye level with this man's crotch. Also, I'm being eyeballed by a man silently smiling to himself in the corner.
4. This woman's elbow is actually in my ribs. She's reading a book. A real book. So I respect her, but we basically share an arm at this point.
5. Ok, so, creepy silent smiler has began making wheezing noises, and I'm not sure what to do here.
6. This is completely packed. This is a fire hazard. How many people actually fit in one city??
7. We're experiencing "technical difficulties" and will be back up and running "momentarily". I suppose stopping now is better than completely breaking down. Though we are in a dark tunnel. This feels eerily similar to that space movie with Sandra Bullock and George Clooney. Am I floating?
8. Ok, I've been spotted by a hipster. He's kind of cute but he's taking pictures of the leather straps that the poor "standers" hold onto at their own risk. The Christian Grey of hipsters?
9. I'm sweating. It's 23 degrees yet the body heat in this small box is unbearable. I can't take off my jacket, though, because this woman's arm is my arm now. Telepathy? Are you there?
10. I'm one more stop away and I haven't had my coffee and yet I still smell like someone dumped an XL hot from Dunkin' in my hair with a side of Axe body spray. Why do people still use Axe?
11. If you get off of the train and see no pigeons or strange substances leaking from the ceiling, it's a bonus. Even more so if you get a smile from a cute guy.
We still love you and all of your inhabitants, Boston. Thanks for giving us a wicked awesome way to get to work.
