I'm going to say it–– starting over is a good thing. Now, say it with me, starting-over-is-a-good-thing. Now that we have got that settled, it is time to tell you a little story of why I believe starting over is a positive thing; it all started with making the decision to take the necessary steps to change for the better.
The first step that I took in this rather long journey is making the decision to want to rebrand myself–– don't get it confused with the act of doing so. Specifically, I took several months to come to this decision. It was a lot of existential thinking of who I was and what I wanted to be. It was a long back and forth game of ping-pong between my pride and my joy which took up the majority of the process' time.
Speaking of time, the period in which my joy fought with my pride, there was a lot of personal growth. That personal growth opened up a lot of doors for me and I began to step out of my comfort zone more. In the past, my comfort zone had been the one thing that always stymied my path. It was like a war zone of multiple mental breakdowns and extreme euphoric experiences that shaped me into an entirely new being almost. It felt like the beginning of the universe–– archaic and in flames. However, the pain I suffered through this ultimate path of starting over was worth it. I slowly began to realize my potential and what I genuinely enjoyed in life.
For starters, I realized that I was really talented in the art of opportunity.
In other words, whatever opportunity that was presented to me, I stopped hesitating and started doing and it had a huge payoff. This art that I had become aware of had awarded me with a lot of fulfillment and achievement. These things included being the Director of Activities for a conference that was always the highlight of my spring semester, becoming the Vice President of Communications for a fraternity on campus (let alone joining a fraternity in the first place), and being more honest with my feelings. It was a wondrous time for my mental health too, but I did struggle quite a bit with all of these new aspects of my life.
During those high points, there were some very low points. For example, early in the semester, I had let someone toxic back into my life and I regretted every second I spent with them in our brief time together. However, later on I got the opportunity to have the upper hand and I ultimately responded to their "hey" text with a "do not text me again" only to receive an "understood" response. I felt really good and it reminded me that taking opportunities, in this case to speak how I truly feel, was a sign of my growth and I had discovered that I am a more strong-willed person than I had thought before.
Another example is a little deeper, however.
One low point really reinforced that I was making proper change. During that low point, I was really upset with myself and everything around me and I blamed others for things that were out of our control. It was a really quiet time for me –– in which I would not talk about it with anyone, and instead of venting, I internalized everything. It was a scary time for me, but again, it was a time to think about who I was. In the end, I felt better after coming to terms with setting my pride aside and starting to do things that would ultimately make me happier.
The second step in this process was a quick one. It was the step that set everything into motion.
I made the conscious decision to restart and privatize my social media. For me, my social media accounts are a huge part of my life which I could use to show an outward version of myself that could get up to thousands of likes and provide me with instant satisfaction. However, that satisfaction did not last very long and it came and went in a matter of hours. Thus, I remake, delete and begin again. In all honesty, a part of my life was destroyed and I went from having a lot of followers to having none, but it had to be done.
The third, and final step of starting anew is learning to live in the moment. When I used to have those thoughts and those kinds of accounts, I dwelled on them for days and sometimes weeks and years depending on the situation. It was gutting, but now I just post what I want and then go on with my day and I feel less inclined to care about the little things and instead appreciate the good of becoming a better version of myself.
Thus, I suggest that you take your time in making your decisions and how you apply them. Never be afraid to start over because there are a lot of opportunities out there that your comfort zone could be keeping you from even seeing.
