Today I want to focus on the things I want to be mindful of in this new year. I'm not really for the whole "New Year, New Me" concept because any day is a good time to make a change. But with that being said, this is the perfect time to put things into perspective. I'm talking about when it's time to start over.
This past May, I found myself trying to deal with what seemed like an inevitable breakup with my boyfriend of almost three years. For a long time I didn't think it was possible to love someone the same way or that I would be with someone who made me feel the ways I did when I was with him. But right now in my life, I'm starting my love life (I really hate the term love life, it makes me cringe because it feels like ~real~ adults use that, so we can use the words dating, or relationship in its place if you prefer) over.
The truth is is that although this bad thing happened to me, and I felt completely lost, at the end of the day, bad things happen and that's just life. I choose to believe (and endlessly preach) that everything happens for a reason, and in retrospect, this was the best thing that could've happened to me at the time. It really enabled me to live more for me, and I feel happier now than ever. What we do and how we handle these things says much more about us than the bad thing itself. So remember that there's a bigger plan out there for you than what you think when it feels like your life is crumbling around you (it's like the domino effect, this one thing could have never happened if this other thing did work out and now I'm happy and it couldn't have been possible without that initial thing not working out) Every step is a step to bring you to another important place in your life.
And today, I've been seeing this really great guy that I haven't seen literallysince high school graduation. We happened to run into one another at bar on a random night out and it's been a really nice surprise. Regardless of whether or not anything comes from it, it wouldn't of happened if everything that has been going on for the past few months didn't happen. Starting over has been so exciting and knowing that I can feel like this again feels great. So there's that.
However, while we're at it, let's talk about the past. The past is the past (and sometimes it should stay there). There's a reason as to why it's behind you anyways if it wasn't good, and sometimes (most of the times) it's better to leave there where it ended then to pick it back up. The past doesn't and shouldn't determine your future because HECK YEAH, YOU are in control of your life. So, that whole going out and seizing the day thing is important. If you want something bad enough then go out and get it yourself. It might not be easy, but man, it'll be worth it.
Oh, and while you're going out and seizing the day, remember that standing up and speaking up for yourself is IMPORTANT. If you have a problem then don't get walked all over like the doormat you are not and tell the person. Your feelings are valid and important, and if you feel like you aren't being heard or you're being treated in a disrespectful way, then say something. If the other person respects you enough, they'll try to see it your way sooner or later, and if they don't, screw them, who needs them anyway?
Life happens, and all of the things you are experiencing are put in your way to challenge you to become a more thoughtful, better you. Things, no matter how hard they seem, will always get better, you just have to believe that they will. Tomorrow is a new day (heck today might be a new day for you) so just get out there and focus and do it up!