“If you do what you always did, you will get what you always got.”

-Albert Einstein

Sometimes in our lives we feel that we have almost become stagnant. We want things to change, and we feel that we are taking the necessary steps to change, but we see no variation in the final outcomes. We have the thoughts and the ideas of wanting to change, however, sometimes we don’t follow through with our actions. We have all been there. Even me. We are at odds with ourselves. Our mind is set on one thing, but our hearts are doing something else.

We all want to be a better person. We all want to do things that will better our future self. We all want to be successful. Nevertheless, we get frustrated because we want all these things, but wonder why the same things keep happening to us. After many years of trial and error, I have concluded that there is a big difference between doing things with your mind and doing things with your heart. Change is scary. Trust me, coming from someone who was very reluctant to change, it can be a terrifying realization to wrap your head around. While many of us are wanting to change, we are afraid to take the necessary steps in order to really see that change. Moreover, if we wish to see a change in ourselves and in our lives, we must start with our hearts. I had to learn this the hard way. I’m about to get real with y’all…are you ready?

One day, I was sitting in the car with one of my friends and I was so overwhelmed by my thoughts and the stream of tears quickly followed. For those of you that know me, I am not one to cry, let alone in front of people. I was so overwhelmed and burdened by the struggles of everyday life, and extremely upset with the direction my life had taken. In my mind, I felt that I was taking whatever steps necessary to do the things I needed to get done, but I still never felt satisfied. Whatever I was doing, I was not being fulfilled.

Later that week, I found myself sitting in on a sermon that changed my outlook on life. The pastor helped us realize just how much power our hearts truly have over our lives. Yes, I am 100% aware that our heart beats and keeps us alive. What I want to explain is that the wants, needs, and passions of our hearts will determine what direction our lives will take. I soon realized that I was going through the motions of everyday life, but I wasn’t backing up my actions with the passions and the will of my heart. In my mind, I was busting my Ass…ets, working myself harder than usual, but I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I was consumed in the praises, and the perspectives of others. Don’t get me wrong…I wanted to do well and be successful. But, I was motivated by all the wrong reasons. Many times, I got caught up in how others would perceive me. Whether it be after I had accomplished something, or succeed at my goals, I wanted praise and acknowledgement. I was motivated by other’s perceptions, as opposed to wanting to do well for myself. My passion lied within my mind, and not my heart. My mind (ego) was being fulfilled, but my heart wasn’t. I was so frustrated. I figured, if I was taking all the right steps, why am I not seeing an actual change? I quickly realized that the wants of my heart were not being fulfilled.

When we want to change certain things in our lives, not only do we need to take the necessary action, but we also should dig deep within our hearts and understand what exactly are the desires of our hearts. If the right motives are not present within our hearts, we will never be fulfilled. We will always feel empty if we do all the right things for all the wrong reasons. Next time you are feeling dissatisfied with the direction of your life, make sure to look within your heart and understand the true motives behind what it is that you do.