If someone makes you miserable more than they make you happy, regardless, you need to let them go. Ever since we were little, we have been told to love people unconditionally. But there comes a time in our lives when we need to get rid of people unconditionally. Some people are so toxic that they just keep slithering and creeping in through the cracks of our resolve. They will literally refuse to respect our boundaries. You need to learn how to just shut the door permanently.
Your life is worth more, and you were not born to just be depressed and pushed around by someone. It doesn't matter what they say. Let them tell you that you're awful and not worthy. Delete. Delete, ban, block, get them out of your life. Compassion? Have some for yourself! You are the only person that can control your own happiness. Do it for yourself, and don't you ever feel guilty.
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I am not trying to preach that all toxic people are cruel and uncaring because they aren't. Many of these people have good intentions. Although, those intentions are not meant for us. They aren't inherently bad people either, but they aren't the right people for us. As hard as it is, we need to let them go for our own sanity. More than likely, we have had some of the best memories with these people. As we grow older, we realize that life is hard enough without being around people that bring us down. As much as you care and may love that person, you need to let them go. You can't destroy yourself for the sake of someone else.
I recently read an article by Lindsay Holmes; a writer for The Huffington Post. To my surprise, I was alarmed by what I was reading. "6 Toxic People Who May Be Sabotaging Your Happiness" describes what the title states. The person who doesn't like you, the person with whom you've had a falling out, the person who is constantly stressed, the person who always argues with you, the person who uses you, and the person who is a bad influence are people that need to be cut out of your life.
In order to deal with people who only focus on your flaws, you need to focus on your positives. Keeping goals in mind, and genuinely being around people who make you happy will keep the toxic out.
A little venting is OK, but if you’re constantly hashing out stressful topics when you’re with this person, your health may be taking a hit. Research shows that stress is contagious. When you’re around someone who is constantly strung-out, it can trigger your body’s own stress response.
Start making yourself a priority. I don't know what situation you may be in, but if you're breaking up with someone you care about, letting go of a friend or removing yourself from a situation that feels painful, you have every right to start making your life a bright and happier place.
Life is such a beautiful thing and we have so much to live for. We are always going to come across people who don't want to support our self-improvement. It's life. They burn that bridge and ask why you don't go back to visit. It's not going to be easy. It will be a process. But I promise, it's so worth it.
You are allowed to terminate toxic relationships. You are allowed to walk away from people who hurt you. Youare allowed to be angry and selfish and unforgiving. Youdon't owe anyone an explanation for taking care of yourself.
Start wanting your own happiness. It is OK to care for yourself. You are not obligated to just sit there and smile and swallow every bit of shit everyone heaps on you. You have a right to protest your own mistreatment and set boundaries for respectful interactions. The rest of this crazy world doesn't realize you have this right, and they will act offended and feel like the victim when you exercise it, but it is yours.
Your mind is such an important and powerful thing. When you fill it with positive thoughts and positive people, your life will start to change. You can't keep dancing with the devil and keep wondering why you're still in hell. Be the change you want to see and you will find your happiness again.
