I remember the first time my mom ever talked to me about someone invading my personal space. She had no problem explicitly telling me about the parts of my body designated as private areas. She told me that I never, ever had to do something I wasn’t comfortable with and that has since translated to all parts of my life.
So what about the situations where you’re uncomfortable but don’t have control? Mom never warned me about that, and I’m sure it’s not at the top of most parents’ lists either. No parent would want their child to ever be in a compromising situation, especially not one categorized as sexual assault.
Sexual assault is any type of sexual contact or behavior that occurs without the explicit consent of the recipient. Falling under the definition of sexual assault are sexual activities as forced sexual intercourse, forcible sodomy, child molestation, incest, fondling and attempted rape.
Something I constantly hear as an advocate against sexual assault is, why would they put themselves in that situation? Were they drunk? Couldn’t they just fight back? If you don’t believe me, just look at the comments section of an article about the Brock Turner case.
Not all people actively fight back. Can you imagine, someone potentially bigger than you, stronger than you, taking advantage of you? Imagine all the things that could go farther south if you began to fight back. Now stop imagining, I don’t want anyone to ever have to deal with five seconds of that ever again, and neither should you.
But instead, let us imagine a world where no woman has to be scared to walk the street at night. Where the first six weeks of college aren’t considered a red zone. Where none of us have friends whose bodies have been taken advantage of. Where there is one less thing to worry about. Would you want to live in a world like that? I would.
But hey, why do you care if you aren’t the one who has been assaulted? What does it matter to you?
My brother, my sisters, my sorority sisters, my future children, and people on the street. No one deserves to ever have their body taken advantage of. There are victims whose attackers have walked away with nothing but a slap on the wrist. Brock Turner, a convicted criminal, is walking free after only three months in jail. Rapists are walking free. There are criminals who do not have to take any accountability for their actions. Serial rapists are out there, and what honestly sets you or the people around you from a future victim?
I see so much value in educating your kids about being a bystander in the event of a potential assault. Educate them on what is and is not acceptable because you would be outraged if anything like this happened to your children. Educate them about what can happen in this world because they should not have to find out through personal experience. Teach them above all else, no absolutely means no and no one is entitled to their body.
Sexual assault is one of the few things we will see in our lifetime that does not discriminate against race, religion, age or sexual orientation. one in 5 women and one in 33 men experience attempted or committed sexual assault. Please help me in educating your children, friends and family about bystander intervention, and support victims you know.
If you've experienced sexual assault, please visit www.notalone.gov for resources.