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The Stages Of Getting Wasted

Always classy, never trashy... until you give me a glass of wine.

Sarah Stephens
Sep 08, 2015
SUNY Oswego
94
The Stages Of Getting Wasted

Stage 1: I'm only going to have a glass of wine

Trying to be classy, eh? So we start with one glass from our classy box of wine that was twenty dollars. We only get top shelf wine

Stage 2: That glass did nothing for me... One more can't hurt

Now we are pouring another glass. As Ke$ha says "tryna get a little bit tipsy." Okay, so now you are tipsy so the one glass of wine turns you into becoming an animal.

Stage 3: Let's get drunk!

Know what? Let's just get drunk because guys suck. So now we rip that box apart and start drinking right out of the nozzle (slapping the bag.)

Stage 4: Wasted (before you know it).

So the casual wine turned into a Saturday night frat party rave. You tried be classy for a minute but lets be real we are drinking out of a box of wine. You are throwing everything. Throwing up. Your dignity? Yeah, you lost that at stage two. Long gone girlfriend.

Getting white girl wasted is something that you don't get until you actually are at this level. It is a feeling you hate to get but somehow are at that point every weekend.

Stage 5: The morning after.

What happened last night? What am I wearing? Did I really makeout with him again last night? Yup, these are his shorts. Oh no. I will never drink again.

Stage 6: REPEAT


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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