Ahhh, it's that wonderful time of year again when the only thing standing between you and a nice long Christmas break is a week of absolute hell. You've worked hard all semester (or maybe you haven't) and now it's time to prove yourself with final projects, papers, and cumulative exams. This is where professors come out of nowhere with the "remember that your 20 page paper and 30 minute presentation is due next week" and you're sitting there absolutely dumbfounded. We all go through it and suffer together, and Spongebob knows exactly how we feel during this week of torture.
Stage 1: First you start getting your life together
Making to-do lists, getting a good seat at the library, even maybe getting more than 5 hours of sleep. Basically, just being a good noodle in the beginning is key.
Stage 2: Then you spend what seems like hours working on one paper
And after you think you've been productive, your progress looks like this:
Stage 3: You start to feel the lack of energy from pulling all nighters
So you just try to convince yourself you don't need a nap.
Stage 4: There's barely anytime to eat because now you're always in the library
So when you do have a chance to eat, you just inhale everything in sight.
Stage 5: You start to feel like you would rather die than look at one more flash card
There's only so many times you can go through the same questions for one exam.
Stage 6: And after all this studying, your mind starts to feel like a bunch a mush.
Almost like...you can't even recall what your own name is anymore.
Stage 7: You start to feel like you're going to break down any second
The stress is building up the night before a test and you just feel like crying.
Stage 8: And you start to look like this:
No one should ever look normal during exams.
Stage 9: So you decide to give yourself a break and binge on Netflix for a while
Then it's 4 hours before your exam starts and you regret it.
Stage 10: When that first alarm goes off in the morning
And you would rather vanish from everything you know to get out of it.
Stage 11: Walking to the exam, you start to accept that maybe you won't do so hot
Right before the professor hands out the exam and asks, "Does anyone have any last minute questions?" and you feel like asking:
Stage 12: The exam is finally given to you, and you suddenly forget everything
You studied hours and hours for this exam, and now all of sudden you're blanking on an open response question.
Stage 13: Finally, you're done with all your exams
Now it's time to rally your friends, if they haven't left already to go home for break.
Stage 14: But then your final grades come out and maybe you failed one of your classes
But that's why they offer summer courses...right?!
Stage 15: Time to hit up the bar again and get really drunk off of some ice-cream
Or actual alcohol, whatever floats your boat.
You win again, finals.
