We’ve all probably felt the urge at some point — your friend introduces you to her new puppy, or your baby niece smiles at you, or you’re watching yet another cat video on the internet, and you’re suddenly possessed with the urge to squeeze that cute thing so hard! So what is it with this strange phenomenon that makes us want to squeeze cute things? Science may have some answers.
The phenomenon is called cuteness aggression. I’ve had it all my life, from the time my youngest sister was born to my current kitten video obsession — show me a cute thing, and I feel an urge to clench my teeth like I’m going to bite something. Not that I would ever actually hurt a cute thing! I’m a vegetarian, so I don’t even bite animals in the way most people do. But something about a tiny kitten just makes my jaw clench.
Scientists aren’t 100 percent sure why cuteness aggression occurs, but they know that it does. In one experiment on the subject, researchers gave participants bubble wrap and told them to pop as many bubbles as they wanted. Then they showed some pictures of animals — normal, cute and funny. Guess who popped the most bubbles? Yep, the cute group. Something about cute animals just makes us want to squeeze things!
One of the leading hypotheses is that our brains create feelings of aggression to calm down the joy and giddiness we feel when we see something really cute. It’s sort of like people who cry with happiness or smile when they’re angry or feel the bizarre urge to laugh during a funeral. You brain is so overwhelmed with one feeling that it has to balance it with the opposite. So, “It’s so cute that I just want to cuddle it!” becomes “It's so cute that I'm going to rip its adorable head off!” to maintain a sort of neurological equilibrium.
Some hypothesize that cuteness aggression towards animals on the internet may also be caused by our basic instinct to protect and nurture. We so badly want to protect and care for the cute thing that we get frustrated that it's on our computer screen, and therefore inaccessible. Then comes the aggression. So maybe having to clench my teeth during a cute kitten video just means I have an extra-strong urge to nurture, not that I'm just really weird. Maybe?
Is this sounding familiar to any of you? Or do you still maintain you are unaffected by really cute things? Maybe the following GIFs will trigger a bit of cuteness aggression...
Look at them, yawning and stretching! Don't you sort of want to squeeze them?
Those eyes! I could just bite him!
He looks like a lightly toasted marshmallow! I'm going to punch something!
I'm so angry!
Aaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!
Aaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you felt any frustration or urge to squeeze while looking at these images, congratulations! You join the ranks of us who experience cuteness aggression! If not, I suppose you're simply saner than the rest of us who are driven to rage by cute things.