Spring semester of my freshman year made me its b*tch
I started off the new school term with promises to myself to be productive, studious, and outgoing. The first week was easy because that's when you just sit in lectures and you maybe only have one assignment. I watched Netflix and napped with every minute of my free time. That was my first mistake. I didn't work to get ahead and only fell behind, I admit that.
Once I knew it was time to get back into the rhythm of school work, that's exactly what I did. I completed all of my homework, every reading assignment, and I studied my butt off when I had an exam or a quiz. However, once I started getting grades back, they weren't too pretty, they were mostly all failing. My sister received weekly calls of me crying that I was not going to pass my classes and my parents would hate me for being a failure. In my math class, I saw my professor at their office hours, saw a student tutor, and tried practice problems online, but I was still failing my assignments. My brain just couldn't grasp the concepts.
If I was trying my hardest, what was the point anymore if I just kept performing under the bar? Almost everyone says (including my mom) that if you try your best, you'll succeed but was that always the case?
I had absolutely no motivation to do anything, not just the things were productive. I didn't even want to go out with my friends, I didn't want to go to the dining halls and eat, even just waking up in the morning was hard. All I wanted to do was stay in bed all day on my phone or sleep. I kept telling myself that I would study later and later. I would do that assignment later and later until I either didn't at all or stayed up until ungodly hours to complete the endeavor. I began to only look forward when I would be at my own house without having to worry about studying for an exam or some other task. It was a terrible coping mechanism and I take full responsibility for adopting it.
By some miracle, I had managed to pass all of my classes except for math. Math was never my strong suit, so I'm not too disappointed in that.
Spring semester is dangerous. You will take any grade just as long as you don't have to go to class anymore. If you need a break from your responsibilities then take it but make sure it doesn't last so long. Complete work as soon as you are given the opportunity to so you do not fall behind, become major stressed, and have more time for self-care.
Please remember that your mental and physical health are both way more important than your GPA. It won't be taken into the afterlife with you.
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