It's spring, and you know what that means! Allergies! Cleaning out your dorm room and going home to your childhood bedroom that has a plethora of questionable posters of "Cool Swoopy Blonde Hair Dudes" in it! Finally throwing away that take-out box that has deteriorated at the bottom of your trash can! Yay. Spring.
Let's drop the facade: everyone hates spring cleaning. As college students, we're all way too stressed out about finals and wrapping up our financial aid situations to focus on cleaning anything at the moment. However, if you're a depressed slacker like me, it gets literally ten times worse! Not only have you likely neglected cleaning your surroundings, you've also likely avoided cleaning up your brain, relationships, and physique. Here are some tips to help you through the absolute mess that is spring cleaning (since I have no tips on how to make it through depression.)
1. Do your laundry.
This one sounds typical, like, "Okay, yes, this is a normal part of every spring cleaning schedule ever," but I can assure you that if you have severe Major Depressive Disorder like I do, you have not done your laundry in probably a month. Gather up your quarters and detergent, boo. Go down to the laundry room. Throw clothes in. Repeat until all of the piles of laundry in your dorm room have been washed, dried, and put away. This will be the worst thing you have ever done. You will feel like you are dying. However, afterward, when you have a gorgeous array of clothing to wear as opposed to the usual wrinkled floral Batman t-shirt and jeggings, you will feel ten times better.
2. Water your plants.
Your plants have to sit there and watch you every day as you lay in bed and cry over the same scene from New Girl fourteen times in one hour. The least you can do for them is give them some refreshing water, especially as it's starting to warm up out there.
3. Tell your friends you're sorry.
Spring cleaning isn't just for your house! If I know anything about depression, it's that it makes it almost impossible to talk to anyone at all. It's the end of the school year, and just as you would go to class and become extremely attentive and active in class to make up participation points for the entire year, it's time to do the same with your loved ones. Let them know how you feel. Tell them that it wasn't actually your intention to remain in your room from five o'clock pm to nine o'clock am every single day since the beginning of the semester without making any noise at all because you're too busy weeping about the depleting population of bees, but you're a flawed person and, here we are, almost five months later, and you don't have enough motivation to change. Tell them that you really do love them; apologize for being the way that you are. I am willing to bet everything I have that they still love you exactly the way that you are and want to take you out to your favorite restaurant sometime soon.
4. Throw away all those brochures that you took from people because you were too afraid to say no.
You're constantly afraid that literally everyone hates you because let's be honest: you hate you. Everything you do is subject to scrutiny. So, even the simplest of things, like turning down a pamphlet or free perfume sample from a person can potentially cause them to curse the day you were born. Now you're left with an impressive collection of random pieces of paper that you definitely do not need. Throw them away. I promise, no one will hate you.
5. Go outside.
I know -- there is nothing more annoying than those "health professionals" who say that all you need to cure your depression is a healthy dose of sunlight. You and I both know that is not true. I've been outside. I still want to die while I'm out there.
However, going out and doing something that you enjoy with (or without) a person that you may (or may not) enjoy can boost your mood, even if only a little bit. The other day, my friend and I went into downtown St. Louis and walked into a little bookstore for a couple hours, and let me tell you: it was the longest period of time that week that I did not want to set anything on fire. Go outside! It won't cure you, but it will take your mind off of things for a couple hours.
6. Clean up your phone contacts.
That girl who you talked to at that party in order to feel less empty but then you never saw her again? Delete. That dude who starts every sentence with, "I'm all for females getting equal pay, but...?" Delete. Your problematic ex who made your depression literally forty times worse? Delete. Forever.
These people are either completely unnecessary, or they worsen your mental state. Spring clean them out of your phone and out of your life.
7. And finally: stop being mean to yourself.
It's super easy and almost an impulsive behavior to mentally scream at yourself that you're doing a horrible job with literally everything you do or don't do. However, this spring, you should start a fun new trend: being nice to yourself. Anytime you think about yelling at yourself, think of yourself as your waitress that has just accidentally spilled a drink all over herself. You wouldn't scream, "You utter disgrace! You're doing such a terrible job," at her. You would make sure she's okay and reassure her that accidents happen to everyone. It's easier to be mean to yourself because the depression makes you literally curse every breath you take, but it's time to start giving yourself credit for all the cool things you do. Like actually getting out of bed. Or eating three meals a day that you can't scoop out of a plastic cup (looking at you, fruit loops.) Or taking a shower in which you do not sit down and cry a little. Baby steps.
This spring, I believe in your abilities. You can clean your dorm room. You can ace your finals. You can survive move-out day. You can survive spring cleaning.
