If you’re like me, then you have said plenty of pretty awful things that have made you feel guilty for hours, days, weeks or even months. I once sent a very insensitive meme in a group chat, because I took the Mexican Word of the Day meme too far in a group chat. I have also told someone’s secret to my friend right in front of the person who told me to keep it a secret. It was a “Whatever we say in this room stays in this room” kind of thing. Sorry, I’m a gossiper. But I have a lot of advice for you guys that can really help you if you get into a pickle of saying something inappropriate.

1. Don’t get into that type of pickle. As they say, “Think before you act,” you must think before you speak. If you’re that type of person who can say anything and everyone loves you and still laughs at that offensive joke you said, then good for you. But for me and many others, we don’t get that type of love. We get into a lot of trouble, because we take things way too far or we gossip about things we shouldn’t.

2. Now if you have already said something you shouldn’t have, because you weren’t thinking before spoke, you’re just going to have to build a bridge and get over it, because there is no turning back of time. Unless you are hiding a secret time machine, but you probably don’t have that. Don’t dwell on it forever, it happened. At some point, it won’t matter anymore, because a lot of the time, people forget all about it

3. The important thing is, if they seem to have forgotten about it, don’t keep reminding them about it by apologizing a bunch of times. Especially don’t apologize weeks later after it is already over and no one cares anymore about what you said. If you apologize over and over again, people will get really annoyed. So grab a full cup and a cap and shut the full cup. Sometimes it is good to have an apology, but not a bunch.

4. Now sometimes, an apology will not work. Depending on the situation, people will get furious with you about what you said; I mean there will be yelling or just straight up telling you that you are a horrible person. No apology can stop a storm of hatred. In this kind of situation, you might just have to get a straw and suck it up, because sometimes that horrible thing you said could just never be forgivable. Maybe you’ll learn your lesson on what to say and what not to say to people.

There is an exception to all of these rules: you can tell your best friend anything. Your best friend has the same humor, so tell them all the offensive jokes you want. They won’t yell at you, they will only laugh. You also won’t have to apologize for that offensive joke. Any gossip you tell them, will not cause a problem, because everyone keeps their best friend’s secret. If you ever need to gossip or send or say an offensive joke to someone, tell it to your best friend. Your best friend is the person who will judge you the least. If you can’t tell your best friend, keep it to yourself!