While walking back from the gym, I encountered a man seated on a flattened cardboard box, staring at the ground, with a sign at his foot asking for any amount of money. I had just withdrawn some money from the bank in order to help a friend purchase cart food and as a result I had a few dollars on my person and decided to put a few next to him. He didn't raise his head or utter a word and I continued walking.
This morning, as I walked past a Whole Foods, a man sitting on a red crate, with a bundle of tightly bound clothes on his right and an empty water bottle on his left, asked me if I had any change that I could spare. I often don't carry my wallet with me, its bulky and inconvenient and I prefer to keep useful cards and IDs in my phone case. Nevertheless, I reached into my right pocket to see if I could find at least a few coins. I tried my left pocket next. Both were empty. I shook my head apologetically and said "I'm sorry, I don't have anything." He retorted, "that's a likely story, just keep walking," and proceeded to ask the person walking behind me.
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In both situations, I crossed paths with individuals who openly were asking those passing them for help. Such occurrences are common for a New Yorker; I don't remember a day that I walked to class or to work without hearing the words "spare change" or "could you spare a dollar or some food?"
But, I also don't remember any time that I asked the individual what had happened in their lives to bring them in front of me that very day, in the hopes that I could give them something, anything, to make their lives easier. I don't remember such a time because there hasn't been such a time. Nor have I seen anyone else asking either. Not to say that that is any excuse, but, it is a reality that is pretty difficult to accept.
Hundreds, maybe thousands of people make homes, perhaps houses is a more appropriate term, out of the nothingness around them, hoping that someone who happens to pass them by happens to reach into their pockets and happens to find a few coins or bills. On a typical day, I pass as few as two people to as many as twenty who have somehow found a corner of the city to try and build themselves up. After three years in the city, I have subconsciously been able to convince myself that offering a dime or a quarter will help alleviate their struggles or pain. But, how do you help someone alleviate a struggle or pain that you yourself don’t understand?
I wish, that along with the spare change that I can at times offer, given that my wallet is conveniently in my bag or that my debit card has some type of balance, some spare thoughts as well.
