Soulmates. Such a cliche and trite word that is the epitome of love and relationships. It’s the final goal that many people strive to achieve. It’s like a scavenger hunt, trying to find the person who holds the key to your heart.
The given definition goes something like this
soul mate
ˈsōl ˌmāt/
noun
plural noun: soulmates
- a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner.
This person is supposed to your perfect match for deep conversations, fun parties, and the person who you go to for anything and everything. But it’s such an enormous pressure that we put on ‘the one’ singular person. Is this really a fair imposition to place upon them. I mean, is this connection even possible?
I find it really interesting that it’s restricted to just having one person who understands every part of you because I think that's nearly impossible. I don’t think it’s probable that there is only one person can satisfy every need in you. And would you really want that?
I think that we have all have many different soulmates in our lives. There’s always someone that we go to depending on what we need. It’s sort of selfish to put all that onto one person don’t you think? That is a lot of pressure to live up to and it’s a lot to expect from just one person.
For example, I have a coffee soul mate. They understand my love for coffee and they know where to find the best cup of coffee (that's a secret between us)
I have a foodie soul mate. They have similar taste to mine and we’re always showing one another new places that we know the other will really enjoy.
I have a ranting soul mate. This person knows exactly what to say when I’m really angry and/or upset about someone or something and I feel a million times better whenever I talk to this person.
Now, occasionally we meet people who align with all these different connections and that's great, but it’s not the same.
Different people have different strengths and different perspectives so we make different connections with different people. Don’t get me wrong, there are definitely some people we can go to for anything and everything, but do we really enjoy our time as much as we would with our specific soulmate for that activity?
I enjoy having these different connections with people because it allows me to get many different perspectives of situations that I wouldn’t get if I only ever spoke to one person about my troubles.
It also allows me to expand my circle which I think is important. It also leaves a very specific role for that person to fill in my life which ensures that they will always be important to me and no one else can fulfill that role.
Also, it's like having a breath of fresh air whenever you meet up with these specific soul mates. I know that there is only one person I workout with and one person I go for walks with. Since this connection is so intimate and special, it creates a bond like no other. That person understands a small part of your soul better than anyone else ever would and I think that's really special.
So don’t put all that pressure on just one person. Allow yourself to spread out and connect with the people around you. It's scary but I promise that it’s so worth it.