Coming to a huge public college from out-of-state, one of the opportunities I was most excited for was joining a sorority. My sorority is by far the most lucrative organization I have joined my freshman year. Not only was I immediately immersed in other freshmen who were feeling that eager-nervous-scared-excited concoction of emotions that I was about starting college, at the end of the week, but I was also apart of a group of girls who I connected with on at least one level: we were sisters now. That being said rushing was a stressful, emotional roller-coaster of a process because I pretty much was going into the week with no knowledge of what to expect as a potential new member. Now, preparing for recruitment from the other side (PC 19 I cannot WAIT to meet you!!), I've learned so many tips and tricks I feel obligated to share with the world.
The Do's:
1. Know what to expect from your school.
Rush is different at every school. Wherever you go, door songs will be intense and kind of scary, conversations will be nerve-wracking, and your social media will probably be stalked. But if you're going to a huge Greek school, rush will probably be at least a week and you will probably see a ton of different houses. At a smaller school, you might not see as many chapters on your campus over the course of a couple of days or a weekend. Whatever your process looks like, it'll help to be prepared.
2. Talk about things you're passionate about.
The girls you're talking to want to get to know you!! Embrace the opportunity to tell them all about the best aspects of who you are or what you love. Whether it be your dog, tater tots, or your coin collection it's important to show that you have things in your life that matter to you. Plus, it makes for great conversation and the chapters you're rushing will recognize that and be more likely to want you back!
3. Look presentable, but dress comfortably.
Based on the size of your school and the formality of recruitment there, your outfits can range from a provided t-shirt and converse to dresses and heels. Make sure that your outfits are appropriate, but trendy and cute is still what you should shoot for if that's your style! As annoying as it may sound, how you present yourself will probably be factored in because it contributes to the first impression you make on each girl rushing you.
4. Base your decisions on your thoughts and feelings.
While being a legacy and having that connection with a sister, mom, or aunt is great, rushing is a process you're participating in so that you find a group of girls that you want to be a part of!! It's more important that you find an organization you are excited about joining than it is to share letters with a family member. Equally, try to ignore talking to other potential new members (PNMs) about their experiences at certain houses. While it's perfectly normal to want to check in on your friend's time during recruitment, how she or anyone else feels about a group of girls doesn't matter as long as you know how YOU feel about them.
5. Trust the process.
During rush week, every time someone uttered these words I wanted to rip my hair out, but it's a cliche with good reason. Rushing is a mutual process; you should pick the house that also picks you. Even though you might feel that you know how the process should go, don't stress if a chapter doesn't ask you back after round one or if you feel that withdrawing from recruitment is the best option for you. After all, it's about the experience.
The Don'ts:
1. Don't research the sororities beforehand.
It's tempting to look into all the options you have lying ahead of you, I know, especially if you have friends or siblings who attend your future university with so much knowledge they can share. However, if you "go in blind" without actively trying to determine reputations or rankings of chapters, you'll be much happier when you end up in an organization full of girls you love rather than being influenced by meaningless factors. Like I said, at the end of the day, you are trying to find YOUR sorority, not anyone else's.
2. Don't talk about the "Three B's."
What are the "Three Bs" you may ask? Boys, booze, and bible. Staying away from talking about fraternities and your love life, alcohol and partying, and religion and other potentially heated topics. This makes conversations stiff and awkward especially considering the fact that the girl recruiting you has probably been instructed to avoid these topics too. Generally, just doesn't always end in the best conversation if the girl rushing you hold different views than you
3. Don't be afraid to ask questions.
This is a major one!! Please inform yourself with everything you want to know about a chapter before you make decisions!! Ask about sisterhood events, philanthropy, and potential leadership opportunities. Whatever strikes your interest!! Plus, it will get the girl rushing you to talk lots about her chapter, leaving her with a happy memory of your conversation and you with lots of knowledge!!
4. Don't be too hard on yourself.
Trust. The. Process. If things aren't going as planned - be it because you aren't enjoying the week, you got dropped by your favorite house, or you think a sorority might not be for you after all - it's okay!! Rushing will tell you a lot about yourself if you let it, which is great because it's meant to be a learning experience. For some it ends with them knowing where they thought they belonged, for others, they end up being surprised with how much they love their chapter, and for still others, it ends in recognition that being in a sorority isn't what they actually wanted. Whatever the case, it's OKAY!!
5. Don't forget to look around.
I want to be clear, in no way am I telling you to compare yourself to other potential new members, but as you progress with houses into the later rounds, it can be really useful to glance at the other girls who are still involved with the house. These girls will be your sisters and pledge class!! This piece of advice ended up really shaping my choices towards the end of rush; I believe fully it can do the same for others. Similarly, look at the outfits of the girls rushing you, how they seem to interact with one another, what their house looks like (if they have one), the decor they use throughout rush etc. All of these small details will allow you to build a more comprehensive picture of each chapter in your head. Information is power!!
One final word: HAVE FUN with rush!!! These are memories that will last your entire life and is the start of a brand new chapter for you as a sister of a sorority that loves and supports you so fully. You got this!!
