To My Soon-To-Be Long Distance Best Friend | The Odyssey Online
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Relationships

To My Soon-To-Be Long Distance Best Friend

A letter of imminent suffering and sadness.

E. Kim
Jan 23, 2017
City College of New York
12
To My Soon-To-Be Long Distance Best Friend
Pexels

To my best friend and side chick:

Whenever I saw any clickbait that had the words “best friend” and “long distance”, I always ignored them because I never really imagined that those articles would be applicable to us. Now that you’ll be across an entire ocean and in a completely different continent, I realized how our friendship will be altered for now. You can’t Ryan-Gosling-from-the-Notebook pick me up and laugh at my screaming, and I can’t make you eat spicy food and make you shit yourself. But I vow that even though I can’t give you tangible pain. I will still be the best damn friend you have.

I will send you FilthyFrank videos every day and force you to watch them. If you don’t, I will send blood curdling selfies every hour. At 4 in the morning on the day of your exam, I will purposely send you text messages saying “Hi”. I will send you letters and mail packages and you will have to wonder if I sent you a lovely note or adult toys. I will make your life just as miserable as it has been when we saw each other each week.

There will be days when I will miss you and miss torturing you, but knowing that you are pursuing what you want makes me happier. I look forward to the day you can threaten to pick me up and throw me out on the street again. I hope you have a kickass time and bring me back food like you promised.

Stay safe and come back soon... (wipes away tears)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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